Afrobella is a generally positive site, but every now and then I just need to be real and speak my mind as frankly as possible. So y’all need to excuse me for a minute. I need to address Mo’Nique woman to woman.
Mo, I love you.
I think you are a hilarious and beautiful woman who works hard to empower other women. I was thrilled to meet you when you came to Miami for the casting for F.A.T. Chance. You were amazingly friendly,and talking with you backstage was an experience I will never forget. Everyone was genuinely approachable and sweet, and the experience was overwhelmingly positive. I still remember your stylist well, she was rocking a fierce skirt that day. So when I saw your picture on Crunk & Disorderly yesterday, my heart sunk.
Mo, you don’t need me to tell you that this is not a good look.
There’s a definite over the top, devil-may-care decadence to your appeal, but not shaving for a red carpet event? You’re just daring the gossip bloggers to notice and make fun of you. And why brag about not shaving your legs on The View? Barbara is already misguided enough about dealing with other ethnicities. Being a black woman, I feel pretty confident that I can disagree with you – Not shaving your legs isn’t an “us” thing. It’s just lazy.
Mo’Nique, you are too Fabulous And Thick to have hairy manbeast legs. Uh uh, girl. And what’s this I hear about you teaching a Flavor of Love Charm School? Oh my damn. Think of the children!
I know you’re a busy woman. You’ve got twin boys, a fast paced career… balancing personal care with a hectic lifestyle can be overwhelming. Shaving can be a daily pain, but if you’re going someplace fancy and not wearing pants or an ankle length skirt, do yourself (and everyone else) a favor. There are some practically effortless ways to lose the fur pants.
Start out by busting out the Nair. Leg hair of your um, length and thickness would respond well to a cream depilatory. That’s the laziest way to preserve your sexy.
For special events, I advise you try the Schick Intuition Plus. In my opinion, there is no easier razor on the market. The skin conditioning solid cartridge even contains shea butter, aloe, and vitamin E, so you don’t have to waste your time moisturizing afterwards. But you really should anyways, so right when you get out of the shower, go ahead and spray your legs with Ginseng Miracle Wonder 8 Oil. It’ll leave your legs with a little shine before it absorbs.
I recommend the spray because clearly, you don’t want to actually slather on some lotion. Ideally, you should also get some Aveeno Positively Smooth Moisturizing Lotion. It promises to help you shave less often. And that certainly seems like one of your goals.
I say this all with love. Keep on making us laugh for the right reasons, and stay gorgeous, gorgeous!