Comments on: Probably The Most Painful Breakup of All

By: Gina

Gina — Thu, 19 Aug 2010 15:08:37 +0000

I too just saw this on Facebook. I went through one of these breakups a few years ago. I felt it was necessary to move on. If a future linking up is in order only time will tell. For now, “doing me” suits me just fine.

By: Roxy

Roxy — Mon, 16 Aug 2010 17:33:19 +0000

Just saw you post this via Facebook. You have no idea how much I needed this.

Thank you so much!

By: AnnellaBella

AnnellaBella — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 21:05:11 +0000

Great post, Bella! I agree with you on the jealousy thing. I think some people are jealous without even being aware they are! Hence, their insecurity starts up all kinds of toxic mess. Remember Monica Lewinsky & Linda Tripp? Classic!

By: SoFrolushes

SoFrolushes — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 17:34:31 +0000

interesting read. I have lost many friends throughout the years. I have so given up on calling people who do not call back or worst only want you to call.
thanks for highlighting this post on twitter

By: 2Serenity

2Serenity — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 16:57:10 +0000

This is a talk that many women should be honest about. I had a major falling out with my best friend from the time I was 3 months old until I was 11. It hurt me so bad but from that experience I have made a conscious effort not to allow another female to be that close to me. That even goes the same with guys. I just can’t take that pettiness from either side if they decide to go down that negative route. My best friend is myself and my family.

Excellent observations, afrobella. I appreciate your honesty here.

By: lilone

lilone — Thu, 23 Oct 2008 07:17:55 +0000

waaaaay late on this post! lol but afrobella i’ve JUST stumbled across this site and been reading it from latest to oldest post for the last two days… ADDICTED =)))

nehoot,
this issue definitely prompted a response. in my few years i’ve fallen into the trap (twice) of denying all signs to see the best in people, against the protests of that little jiminy(sp) cricket voice. my lesson learned the second time around (when i did take note of the signs and begin to distance myself) was that as painful as it is we have to be honest about outgrowing toxic relationships. the longer you stay and fake it – the bigger and badder it will end. the good {and bad} news though is that those relationships will end.

again, thank you soooooo much for this blog!

By: Coffy

Coffy — Wed, 31 Jan 2007 03:43:49 +0000

sometimes it’s not the breakup, but the things that happen after that really hurt. no matter how nasty a relationship ends i pride myself on not buying into the idea that, now i have the right to air your dirty laundry. i think what people forget is that relationships go two ways, and what you know about me i also know things about you. why can’t people just break up cleanly, without the gossip and backstabbing. another good thing to remember is no matter how awful that person was, there was something about that that attracted you to them. i use the onld standby, we just grew apart, and keep it moving.

By: Nikita

Nikita — Tue, 14 Nov 2006 15:01:41 +0000

When the season is over for some friendships, you have to let it go. When they insist that you act, behave or have the life that they have you have to let it go. If they turn away every time you are going thru some type of confusion, it is time to let it go. I am facing that with a friend. This is hard to write, because it hurts, but it is also very true. Either the friendship will change or you will move on. People forget who you are, they forget where you have been and that you have faithfully remained a friend, even when they walked away from you, you kept the door open. They will miss it one day, but let those folks go. I am struggling a lil’ with this, but I am getting there. Great post.

By: Mrs. Mer

Mrs. Mer — Tue, 14 Nov 2006 12:23:29 +0000

I’m new to your blog, and I got this link by way of Nappturality.com. I went through a friend break-up last year, and I’m going through it again this year. You’re so right in that trying to talk through it does not help. If anything, it makes it worse. I won’t go into details about what happened, but I am hurting a bit right now, not only about this most recent breakup between me and an ex-friends, but yesterday’s blog entry has brought up feelings about the friendship that ended between me and another woman last year.

I have been trying to move on by making new friends and but every now and then, I still need to vent about it. Thanks for the blog:)

By: Coffy

Coffy — Tue, 14 Nov 2006 00:54:08 +0000

i got into trouble trying to make a seasonal friend a life long friend. all though in non verbal ways they told me, “i’m going to screw you over”, i held on.