In case you were wondering, this is what terrible two looks like. Here’s hoping my niece, Little Afrobella Dominique, can still make the “nice” list after this incident!

She LOVES makeup, and this photo was taken immediately after she got all up in my Aunty Opal’s makeup bag. She got lipstick and foundation all over. But hey – she’s starting to glam it up early!

Anyone know of any safe-for-kids makeup playsets I could get her for Christmas, so I can keep her away from my aunt’s supply?

Without further ado, here’s the lucky five –

Warrior 11209

Candice

Gabby

Staynatural

and LBellatrix.

Congratulations! Look out for an e mail from me in order to get your contact info, but if you read this before you hear from me, just drop me a line with your full name and address to bella@afrobella.com.

I knew the comments page would blow up for Miss Jessie’s, and thank you all for entering. I wish someday I can just have a giveaway item for everyone who writes in. I am sorry if your name wasn’t among the randomly chosen this time around, but here’s hope. I’m working on lining up some very exciting Christmas giveaways, and * fingers crossed * one of them will be an item from the Oprah’s Favorite Things list. I’m working on it, and I really hope it works out, bellas. And I promise, it won’t be for one of these.
Keep your eyes peeled, December should be a good giveaway month!

Please don’t ask me to choose my favorite En Vogue video. The funky divas had a hold on me ever since Hold On. Like Lauren from Stereohyped, I too wanted to be one of them — usually Cindy, but I always thought Dawn was too fierce for words.

Lots of En Vogue videos really honed in on the women’s beauty, the exquisite attention they paid to their makeup and hair. For example, the fierce fashion show of Free Your Mind, and check out the intro to Giving Him Something He Can Feel — is that El DeBarge drooling in that audience, alongside the likes of Johnny Gill? (a side note – when En Vogue dropped Funky Divas, I thought their version was the original. Then I saw Sparkle. And then, I heard the definitive version. OMG, check out Aretha’s outfit in that clip. Loves it).

So obviously I can’t pick a favorite En Vogue video, but I have one that means more to me than the others. Funky Divas was one of the first cassette albums I owned, and I wore that tape into dust. So let’s just say that Give It Up Turn It Loose struck a special chord in me, back in 1992.

So gorgeous. Talk about turning the glamour up a notch, right? The first time I saw this video, was the first time the lightbulb of “Wow, I want to do my makeup like THAT” clicked on. I started using my mom’s kajal stick and dreaming of a transformation from gawky preteen into glamazon. The love of makeup and primping and all things self indulgently girly were already instilled in me thanks to Mama Bella, but my admiration of Nineties black style icons like the women of En Vogue shaped the woman I have become. This video still inspires me. I love the thick, Fifties brows and perfectly applied liquid liner look. Like En Vogue’s music, it never goes out of style.

I found this interesting NY Times article about the behind-the-scenes stylists helping on this video to create that definitive En Vogue look, a “three man finishing school” that coached the group on everything from how to accept an award to how to select the perfect clothes. I’ve often thought a finishing school for famous people could be a good thing — I’m sure more than a few celebrities who could use a lesson in manners came to your mind, too. But perhaps it was that molding and preening and fussing that led to the group’s demise. The article ends on a foreboding note — “One image stricture is that “the girls” must appear as a unit, even though they often disagree about how they like to look individually. “If we have to wear the same thing,” Ms. Robinson said, “Cindy will vary it by wearing a halter neck, and Terry, who’s very conservative, prefers to be more covered up.” Of course, there’s no telling how long harmonious diversity will last. “In the same way that Motown worked, where eventually a whole series of artists tired of that system and left to go out on their own,” Mr. DeCurtis said, “all four or any one of them might get to the point where she wants greater freedom.”

Ain’t that the truth. By 1997, Dawn Robinson had left to pursue her own solo career, and EV3 remained. I lost track of the ladies after Don’t Let Go — apparently they added a member or two, and released some albums that didn’t fly. Hope returned when all four ladies joined Salt N Pepa at the 2005 Hip Hop Honors, and I loved them singing backup on Stevie Wonder’s So What The Fuss. But amidst rumors of financial differences, and some frankly depressing rumors about Dawn — who has some new solo music and talks about a big comeback on her MySpace — the future of the original En Vogue lineup looks murky. But hey, if Salt N Pepa could get it together thanks to reality television, maybe that’s the solution for En Vogue. I know I’d watch that for sure! For now, all I can watch is the old videos and keep my fingers crossed for a comeback.

I won’t ask you to choose one favorite En Vogue video — it’s too hard to choose just one! Tell me which ones make your top three, bellas!

I read this story on Bossip, and I was struck on so many levels. Jill Scott tells the story of a recent racist encounter.

“I was waiting outside for the valet to bring the car round, and these … I say kids, but they must have been 25, looking wealthy, five-o’clock-in-the-morning wasted. And this guy’s saying, ‘Step back nigger, step back nigger.’ He’s saying it like it’s a song, but there’s nobody out there but me. I was taken aback, and I said, ‘Excuse me?’

And he said, ‘Shut your mouth and don’t say a word when a white man is talking.’

“I’m not kidding. I started laughing, and I followed him and his cohorts through the parking lot laughing hysterically, and they became more and more uncomfortable. It was one of the best moments of outrageous laughter I’ve had. To think for one moment I could possibly fit into that box … I am so far from that word that it is funny. They looked so uncomfortable; I wanted to emasculate him, to make sure he was getting no nookie that night. The girls sobered up and were looking scared. It was something else – the first time in my life I’ve been called that. Wow. But I enjoyed it. You must fight back; it’s imperative. I like the fight in me now.”

You can read the complete interview here.

I like the fight in Jill, too. The story just reinforces my belief that I could never understand the mindset of a racist. That anyone could look at a proud, strong black person and think those thoughts – even worse, actually utter such despicable words – totally blows my mind. It’s just crazy to me that some people still actually believe that the color of their skin gives them any kind of superiority over others. In 2007! It’s just so completely ludicrous.

Like Jill Scott, I have had an extraordinarily charmed life in this regard. Growing up in a country where people of color were the decided majority, then moving to a city that’s a kind of multicultural melting pot, I can honestly say that I haven’t experienced the particular sting of personally directed verbal racism. Miami isn’t exactly the part of Florida where you’re likely to experience something like that – gotta drive up north a bit, I reckon.

The racism I’ve experienced thus far has been more subtle. I get it in the form of baleful glares, insanely ignorant questions and comments (you speak english so well!), and deliberate exclusion. I’ve had people try to make me feel less-than by their actions, but I’ve never had someone dare try to do that with words. And honestly, I’m not exactly sure how I’d react to that.

We’ve come such a long way from the days of civil rights. It wasn’t that long ago at all that white people openly, brazenly calling black people “niggers” was more than commonplace. Back then, there wasn’t an option for response. It wasn’t that long ago when there were segregrated restrooms (hello, Tyson Chicken plant in 2005). What seems so antiquated, so ridiculous, so distant from today’s generation is but a recent memory for some of our older relatives. The statement of this entitled, ignorant, wasted white boy — “Shut your mouth and don’t say a word when a white man is talking,” might have successfully shut my ancestors into silence. In 2007, it’s like a joke — like, wait a minute. You didn’t just seriously say that to me. You’re kidding, right? You better be. Oh, it’s on now.

I’d like to think I’d have grace and presence of mind like Jill did, to simply laugh the racist into shame. But them’s fighting words. Most likely, I’d bust a good old-fashioned Trini cussing on him and escalate the situation. Or worse, I’d be so shocked I wouldn’t know what to say, the moment would pass, and I’d spend the rest of the evening pissed off at myself, coming up with perfectly phrased emasculating comebacks.

Have you ever had someone come at you with that kind of racism before? How did you handle it? How would you respond to Jill Scott’s situation?

Monday mornings after a lovely long weekend normally catch me totally off guard. Not this time! I’m working hard on my time management. This weekend was beyond full and fabulous. Let me tell you all about my Thanksgiving getaway, bellas.

Instead of dealing with airport hassles and expensive, too-brief flights, we made reservations and drove over to Sanibel Island. Wow. What a beautiful place to be. The island is entirely made of shells, and the beaches are covered in millions of beautiful seashells in so many colors. The weekend was all about fantastic food, colorful cocktails, and collecting spectacular shells.

We woke up at like 6:30 in the morning on Saturday and the beach was already packed with stooped over shellers. We wandered along the sand bar left by low tide, avoiding jellyfish and picking up a LOT of cockle shells and abalone, and now I’m contemplating what fun crafty project I’m going to undertake with my shelltastic bounty. I’d highly recommend Sanibel for a romantic getaway for two, or for a unique family vacation — the kids will NOT get bored on this beach. Now I’m back and relaxed for now. Catch me around 3 p.m. today and I might not be feeling as laid back. But right now, I’m still basking in my post-vacation glow. If you want to see some stunning photos of Sanibel, click here.

Because of an acute combination of house guests, holidays, and fun, I haven’t had the opportunity to do any long-form Afrobella writing recently, so look out for some bigger posts coming up soon. I’ve got a lot to say! But not just yet. For now, to tide you over on a Monday back at the office, here are some of the great articles I’ve been finding on some of my favorite blogs.

I’ve shared my love for Racialicious repeatedly, but I’ll just restate how I feel — Racialicious is a weekly must-read for me. I love their mix of material, from TV to politics to social issues, all written with deep thought and cultural insight. I always especially look forward to posts by Latoya Peterson of Alter Ego Maniacs — she totally seems like my kinda bella, and the issues she writes about are really relatable to me. Like this post on the meaning of “bougie” in the black community. Latoya’s writing is so deep and honest, and as someone who’s also been called “bougie,” “siddity,” and “uppity,” I totally identified with a lot of what she was saying. There comes a time when you gotta stop worrying about what people are saying about you, and just focus on being the best person you can be.

Have you read about Latasha Norman? She’s been missing for over a week now, and the police chief in Jackson Miss. says race is the reason her disappearance hasn’t gotten more mainstream news attention. The Associated Press story quotes Jackson Police Chief Malcolm McMillin as saying that Norman’s disappearance should get “the same kind of concern” as that of Stacy Peterson. “As far as the interest by the national media in the story, I think race probably had an impact,” said McMillin, who is white. “It’s a small college in the South. It’s the daughter of simple people who maybe are not important outside of their circle, and maybe we don’t attach the same importance to them that we do for other people.” Tell us something we don’t know, Chief. I haven’t seen this story on CNN or MSNBC yet, so let’s raise the flags within our own community, and keep the Norman family in your thoughts and prayers.

I’ve been following this story on hair discrimination in the military, and it totally takes me back to the whole Glamour magazine issue. I will be writing more on this later this week… but the first thought that came to mind as I read that article is, don’t we NEED professionally trained military officials now, more than ever? Why would anyone give sisters in the military grief over their hair — threatening them with dishonorable discharge, no less — when we’ve got so many enormous fish to fry right now? It makes no sense to me. I’d love to hear from any proudly natural bellas who are in, or who know a lot about the military — I find this particular regulation really hard to understand.

Speaking of Glamour… their big Women, Race, and Beauty round table discussion is set to take place tomorrow. I was invited, but y’know, I live in Miami and this will be taking place in Times Square New York, so I can’t be there. But the amazing Farai Chideya will be the moderator, and with panelists like Vanessa Bush (executive editor of Essence), and Lisa Price, founder of Carol’s Daughter on the panel, I sincerely hope that serious issues are brought to light and change comes from this panel. In light of the fact that designers like the ever-fierce Dame Vivienne Westwood has slammed the industry for being racist, I hope magazine editors really start to examine their role in broadening the horizons of what’s celebrated within their pages, and start to represent all shades of beauty.

And FINALLY – because I gotta stop writing now before I’m totally late for work — here are the winners of the Kinky Curly giveaway! Drumroll please…

Tamika T

Robin

Patricia

ASW

and Surayasmom,

you’re the big winners of the giveaway!! I’ll e mail you this week for your contact information – but if you see this message first, please feel free to e mail me at bella@afrobella.com to expedite the process. If you didn’t win THIS giveaway, keep your head up! The Miss Jessie’s giveaway winners will be announced by the end of the week, and who knows – the next giveaway could be coming up sooner than you think!

I won’t be that jerk who says “happy Monday,” on a day like today… so let’s just say, let’s get this day over with. Are you with me on that?

When my hair is at it’s dirtiest and knottiest and most difficult, when I haven’t had a chance to give it a good wash or comb it out in a week, there’s one product I reach for before all others. That’d be Miss Jessie’s Rapid Recovery. It is THE BUSINESS.

There are a lot of deep conditioning treatments on the market, and trust me, I have tried a number of them. But I gotta admit, when Titi Branch told me they were coming out with this particular product, I already knew I was going to love it. Back when I interviewed her, she said that the treatment was something they used exclusively in the salon. “It’s great. It really helps to repair dry and split ends, and to bring moisture to your curly hair. Curly hair really looks best when it’s moisturized, conditioned, plump, and happy,” she said at the time. Well now I’ve had the chance to try it, and Titi was so right.

Especially now when the weather is cold and your hair is exposed to harsher elements, or tucked away under a hat, deep treatments make the world of difference. Miss Jessie’s salons use Rapid Recovery under a dryer, and to keep your hair strong and healthy, I’d strongly recommend investing in a conditioning heat cap. I have that Gold n’ Hot model and I feel like a dork when I wear it, but it really makes my hair feel healthier and behave more like I like it to. Fortnightly treatments of Rapid Recovery with my heat cap has made a real difference to my hair.

Titi explained what makes this stuff so special: “What’s great about this product is its ability to supremely moisturize and hydrate dry brittle hair. Specifically for natural hair and naturally curly hair, dryness is always an issue. Shea butter and avocado cream oil (hydrogenated vegetable oil) are the foundation ingredients that aid in penetration for a rich radiant sheen that produces a smooth tangle free curl.”

I might as well just out myself as a Miss Jessie’s stan right now. I had real reservations about the price point way back when, but having tried the products, I know now that there’s a real reason that post that I wrote back in August 2006 has over 100 comments of bellas testifying. Now that Miss Jessie’s has come out with smaller sizes, I have no complaints. I can wrap my mind around a $9 2 oz jar of product, and for the Curly Pudding, that 2 oz can go a longer way than you might think. Not so sure about stretching a jar of Rapid Recovery, though. I have a pretty thick mane, and that recommended “golf ball size dollop” sometimes needs a little extra heft. And $48 is a lot to shell out for a product if you’re a bella on a budget. So here’s a little Thanksgiving cheer for you all. It’s the Miss Jessie’s Rapid Recovery giveaway!

Five lucky bellas can win a tub of Rapid Recovery of their very own. Just leave a comment that begins by saying “I need Miss Jessie’s in my life!” and tell me why you could use a little Rapid Recovery. I’ll announce the winners next week, when I return from my Thanksgiving getaway. I’ll also be announcing the Kinky Curly winners then, because the Thanksgiving madness swept me away. Apologies, bellas.

Worried you won’t be one of the lucky five? You’re STILL in luck. Miss Jessie’s is currently offering a buy one get one free deal! So you can treat yourself to the product you’ve been needing, and score the other item you had your eye on. Or even better, if you’ve never tried Miss Jessie’s and want to know what each product is all about, you can pick up the Travel Size Value Pack and get 2 oz sizes of everything.

Happy shopping, bellas, and happy Thanksgiving!