I kept my hair short & natural, wore high top fades a la Larry Blackmon and experimented with color until 1992 when ‘The Wrap’ became popular. I decided to give straight hair another try. Even that proved too much work for me. I cut off my hair again in 1993 after deciding you can’t fight Mother Nature and win (at least I couldn’t). Once more, I wore it short and was even baby butt smooth for about a year.

In 2000 after my mom died, I became responsible for taking care of my grandmother, who bless her, is still alive today and kickin’ 99 in the behind. I stopped my regular hair cut routine gradually because I didn’t have the time or the will to keep up with the regular maintenance. I started wearing bright scarves and headbands to help control my hair and to keep everything in place. My trims faded from once every 4 weeks to once every 6-8 weeks and finally around 3 times a year.

About 3 months ago, I went to my stylist of 14 years for one of those 3 times a year. He washed me and blew my hair straight to check my ends. My hair straight was bra strap length. I was totally amazed. No major trimming was necessary and when I wore it to work the next day, most of my co-workers didn’t recognize me.

Going natural was the best thing I could have done for myself, even if at the time it was not a popular thing to do. I had a job at a bank and the natural was a silent taboo. Probably the only place that accepted it as part of any fashion statement was New York.

I didn’t let the opinions of family, strangers or straight, long hair lovin’ men faze me and now it’s the big thing to do.

I’m still trying to find the Holy Grail of hairstyles for me, but I strongly encourage any woman who’s thinking about ‘The Big Chop’ to do it. There’s so much support out there and lots of natural hair care info. I didn’t have that to guide me, but I think I did alright.

Do you and be naturally happy and happily natural.

Bella – I heard about you at the BGLH forum in Chicago. Now I have come across your site/blog. I will be on here often. I wish I had met you for myself.

So one saturday night i said to myself, fuck it! yo can handle this and i chopped all my hair, the next week you know what happen, pain, tears, regrets, i going to a salon near my work a beautiful guy with long locs attend me, i was so embarrassed to show my hair, and he said to me a totally stranger, love you and love your hair, he is gonna love you back, he cut a lil more of my hair, and they he styled and the hair was wonderful.

Now everyday i feel more comfortable with my hair, i know its short, but its not going to be like that forever.

i think its better to do the big chop, cause its way to learn and let go.

i dont know why i didnt do it before.

Fatima