This has been one of those weeks where I wish I could just go back to Monday and start over. I’ve been pretty much flat in bed, drinking Nyquil by night and Dayquil by day. Yup, I’m sick and on top of that the deadlines and e mails don’t ever stop when you work for yourself. So through this week I’ve been soothing my troubled spirit with the kind of music that helps me feel better.

When it comes to songs that offer than aural healing I’ve been desperately needing, it has nothing to do with genre or a particular artist. It’s entirely a lyrical thing. And sometimes it’s just the chorus that lifts me up.

This post is about to get random! Are you ready?

5. Deliver Me From My Enemies by Vivian “Yabby You” Jackson.

I wrote a longer post about this song for the Game Well and Truly Over blog’s 2010 Music Project. And it’s true, I really do need to listen to this song at least once a week. The horns, the rhythm, the harmonies all intoxicate me. But the lyrics say it ALL.

Deliver me, oh my God, from my enemies.
Oh I? plea unto thee, to guide me.
Cause me to hear thy love and kindness in the morning.
For in thee do I trust, cause me to walk in thy way
For I lift up my soul right up to thee,
Teach me to do thy will, for thou art my God,
Thy spirit…it is good. Lead me in uprightness.

Yabby You passed away this year, after a brain aneurysm. His musical legacy will never be forgotten by fans of roots reggae music.

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In my angstiest, angriest teenage days, I was a big Nirvana fan. Huge. Posters on my wall, staying up at night to watch the videos on Alternative Nation. I mostly kept the obsession to myself — not everyone at my school was into rock music. My alternateen existence was mainly shared with a few classmates, and the guys who ran the booth where I bought my music at the mall. Every week I spent my allowance at a so-obviously-illegal kiosk, where all of the latest albums were copied on cassette.

Yes, I was BIG into cassettes. I’ve still got quite a collection.

Anyway, at this particular kiosk I got everything I wanted. All of the music I saw on cable TV and in my Sassy magazines, the music they totally weren’t playing on the radio in Trinidad. I bought albums by Green Day and Bjork and Soundgarden. And I got every Nirvana album from Bleach to Unplugged, all on cassette. I practically burned a hole in those tapes, rewinding songs just to hear Kurt Cobain’s yowl, so filled with pain and emotion.

I remember his death very clearly, even though I was somewhere hot and bright, so far away from bleak Seattle. I was at my friend Carys’ house. My brother called, because he’d seen it on the news and he knew about the posters on my wall and my tape collection. I cried for Kurt, and I wanted so much to be in a place where fellow Nirvana fans were sharing their grief.

That was in 1994. Today, February 20, would have been Kurt Cobain’s 43rd birthday. To give tribute to him, I present my top 5 favorite Nirvana songs.

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Did it sneak up on you too?? Tomorrow is Valentine’s Day, which means you’ve still got a few hours to sneak off to the mall to get your special someone a gift to remember. I got your back, fellas! Here are some outstanding ideas for you that I’ve tried and tested. And they’re all available at the mall today, so get up and get!

Idea #1. Godiva Candle. See, here’s the thing. Valentine’s Day has become synonymous with chocolates. And not every woman wants a box of chocolates. Many of us are dieting, or trying to eat healthier…and a box of chocolates is just gonna sit there and tempt you. If you’re getting a gift for a loved one who is working on her fitness, get her a Godiva candle. Candle Luxury has the delicious limited edition Chocolate Strawberry Rose candle for sale, but if you don’t have time for all of that and need a gift in a bag pronto, go to Bath and Body Works. Get the Godiva White Chocolate Magnolia candle. It’s equally potent, and equally intoxicating.

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Y’know, I’m not even mad at John Mayer.

I read that Playboy interview and I’d actually like to thank him. Thanks for allowing your foot-in-mouth disorder to shine so brightly, and for giving us all something to remember the next time your trite, boring music comes on the radio. I’ve had my feelings about his character for a long time now, so the idiocy he so rampantly displayed didn’t surprise me one bit. John Mayer has been saying stupid things to the media for a while and this interview just happened to be studded with some exceptional quotes. This whole “scandal” gets a massive eye roll from me. As do all of his meaningless lyrics about appreciating women.

I think John Mayer is a musician who wants to be a comedian. And I think he should just play his guitar, sing his sappy top-40 easy listening songs, don’t kiss and tell, and stay in his lane. Having said that, I think the only people who should REALLY be mad about his Playboy interview are Jennifer Aniston, Jessica Simpson, and Kerry Washington. I’d love to be a fly on the wall when Kerry Washington finally gives John Mayer a piece of her mind, actually. Because, like the Black Snob, I am wondering what “white girl crazy” means.

And as for the rest of the women who are up in arms over his chronic oversharing…well here’s some new music and new musicians to add to your playlist, to fill that void.

1. Ben Harper.

Mmm, mmmm, mmmmmm. Ben Harper looks GOOD, he puts on an amazing live show, he’s sick on the lap steel, and he can sing like nobody’s business. So why is it every time I see him in concert, it seems like the only people of color there are him and me? I don’t get it. Ben Harper’s music can be classified as rock, but I’ve seen him do INCREDIBLE soul music covers. Like Use Me and Sexual Healing. His song My Father’s House is being sold on iTunes to benefit Haiti. If you like John Mayer, you’ll probably love Steal My Kisses. It’s cute and catchy. Click here to treat yourself.

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If Bob Marley was alive, today he would have celebrated his 65th birthday. Every year on this day, fans gather to listen to his music and honor his legacy. From London to Ethiopia to Jamaica to right here in Chicago, we’re celebrating Bob Marley Day. My relationship with his music goes back as far as my earliest childhood days. Check the timeline.

When I was a toddler, my dad spent time in Jamaica studying for a master’s degree. When he returned, he brought what seemed like Bob Marley’s entire record collection with him. Uprising. Natty Dread. Burnin’. Survival. Rastaman Vibration. We had all the LP’s and from that early age, I started soaking them up like a sponge. I swear on the Bible that I have clear, distinct memories of seeing footage of Bob Marley’s funeral on television. The coffin surrounded by an ocean of weeping fans, the mourning of a people. I know I probably have created these memories — Bob passed in 1981. I wasn’t more than two at the time, but part of my brain swears that I witnessed this moment with the rest of the Caribbean.

One of my earliest embarrassing memories is of my brother Dominic sneaking up on me as I sang Redemption Song to myself (I must have been only four or five, and of course I didn’t know the lyrics).

When I was a teenager, Bob’s lyrics helped me navigate my way through oceans of frenemies. I absorbed his lyrics. Listening to his music gave me that feeling of spiritual balance that I felt unable to attain at church on Sundays with my parents.

And to this day, whenever I need a little guidance, a little perspective, a little satisfaction for my soul — I turn to him. Rest in Peace, Mr. Marley. It’s an understatement to say you left this world too soon.

Here are my top 5 favorite Bob Marley tunes, in no particular order. That would be too difficult.

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2009 brought new style challenges my way — moving to Chicago was a fashion revelation. I get annoyed when those who don’t know better say that Chicago isn’t a fashionable city. Sure there are those who dress down 24/7 (Uggs and sweatpants. Why?) but striding around these downtown streets, there are many women and men who have encouraged me to step my game up. Chicago style doesn’t try too hard, it doesn’t scream “look at me, look at me!” It’s less shrill and more effortless. Thanks to items that I was lucky enough to review in 2009, I felt like I fit right in. These are my favorites from the areas of jewelry, clothing, accessories, and shoes.

1. Peace Images — what more can I say about Peace Images that I haven’t already said? I have never met Camille, but she is totally a friend in my head. Her jewelry is AMAZING. The quality, the look, the creativity – hats off to her, for real. I own a few “peaces” and plan to get more, and thankfully there’s a neverending flow of new items debuting on her Etsy page. Seriously – she is always working on something new, unique, and show stopping. Every time I wear her Coffey earrings, someone stops me to ask about them. Her work with chains is stunning — her shoe chains, body chains, ear chains, joined rings… super fly. And now, for my ladies with locs or twists — hair chains. HOW FLY is this hair accessory?? And how fly is Camille? She’s got a blog now, too! Check her out!

2. Cut It Out apparel. A teeshirt line with a message and a vision that any afrobella would be proud to rock — can you dig it? I sure can! Cut It Out is the brainchild of Brooklyn-based bellas Tirinda & Noricia. Their teeshirts are high impact, inspiring, affordable, and of good quality. I’m proud to rock my Grace Jones homage tee in the summer, and now in the fall layered over a long sleeved tee. I’m excited to see what’s next in store for Cut It Out. Wearable homages to some afrobella inspirations, perhaps?

3. MBT Goti boots. My first encounter with MBT shoes came this fall, as my husband and I were strolling down Michigan Avenue. We passed some kind of orthopedic medical supply store, and I saw a sign for shoes that promised to solve knee and back problems, relieve neck tension, and do all kinds of other marvelous things. I tried them on and walked around the store. These round-bottomed shoes feel crazy at first, but I was immediately intrigued and knew I had to wear them for a longer time to try them out. I got that opportunity this December, and I gotta say — the Goti boots are the coolest-looking MBT’s out there, in my opinion. My only complaint with these boots — they’re a little tight for bellas with large calves. And the zipper looks cool, but I totally got it stuck and couldn’t get my boot off for an hour recently. A bigger, more finger-friendly zipper would be awesome. But despite those minor flaws, I LOVE these boots. They’re funky and attractive in a unique way, and SO comfortable to walk in. When I wear them I feel aware of my posture becoming straighter, and my super-flat feet which sometimes get achy, feel amazing in these. I wear them all the time. It’s enough to make me almost overlook the hideousness of the other pairs, just to have a pair to wear in warmer weather. Almost.

19. Um, Coach. That is all. The biggest giveaway I’ve ever hosted. Coach included me in their Holiday Blog-a-Day, and gifted me with a purse. The prettiest purse ever. I just want to pet it and hug it and call it George. Instead I only take it out for the most special of occasions when I want to feel uberglam.

20. Not Your Daughter’s Jeans. These were my fashion staples all year long. I initially bought my usual size, but I noticed they stretched out. Then when I went to Chicago’s fabulous plus size boutique Viva La Femme, and they clued me in — get one size down. I got me a pair of fly bootcut gray jeans that streamline and enhance my curves in the best possible way. I wear them everywhere. And my next pair of jeans will probably be a pair of NYDJ’s. But I’ve got my eye on those Cookie Johnson’s!

So that’s the best in style. One more category and I can finally move into 2010! Did you make any amazing fashion discoveries this year?