My sister-in-law recently left me a comment and said that the T.B.S posts are her favorite. In a way they’re mine, too. I wish I could see more brutally honest sponsors-be-damned beauty writing in magazines. Sometimes a product sucks and you gotta call it out for what it is. I consider this a service to all product junkies out there. These companies are rich enough. They don’t need any more of your money!
Here are three products I completely regret buying. Next time you see them leering at you from the aisle of your local drug store, give them the side-eye and keep it moving.
John Frieda Frizz Ease Dream Curls Curl Perfecter. What a horrendous misnomer. It puports to “transform wilted waves and curls into sexy swerves, curves, & spirals. Alcohol-free formula leaves hair super-silky, never “crispy.” For my 4 A hair, all this stuff did was turn existing curls into limp waves. My curls actually unraveled and became less defined. I looked like Buckwheat.
Dream Curls Curl Perfecter is one of those products that requires “scrunching” to achieve an effect, so I think it wasn’t meant for me because my hair springs into curls on its own. I have tried many of the Frizz Ease products, to similarly disappointing effects. The serum leaves my tresses covered in gloppy residue, and the finishing cream had no penetrating power or noticeable effect on my hair. Forgive me, politically correct types when I use Brad Pitt’s terminology. At this point I can only assume that John Frieda’s products are basically made for white-people hair; ’cause they don’t do diddly for me. But I asked a Peruvian friend who has pale skin, blue eyes, and loose brunette curls, and she said it sucked for her as well, so who do they work for? If any John Frieda products have satisfied your naturally curly haired needs, please let me know. I’m batting 0 for 3 over here.
Aussie Dual Personality Mousse + Conditioner seemed so fascinating at first. It squirts out as mousse, but claims to “style your thirsty mane while keeping it soft and shiny.” Here’s a formula for you, Aussie. Mousse + Leave In Conditioner = a bad idea. I don’t want a leave in to make my hair hard, and I’m sure people who use mousse don’t want it to leave their hair without hold. The two ideas don’t gel in my opinion. And this product made my hair stiff and clumpy and unattractive to see and touch. Small wonder, since the ingredients list is chock full of cones and propane and other ingredients to avoid. Try better still, Aussie.
I’ve had great results with the 3 Minute Miracle, but there’s something I just don’t get about companies that use animals as their mascots while simultaneously performing animal testing. I’m not a PETA member, but that just don’t make sense to me.
Coup de Theatre mascara by Bourjois Paris. I wanted so much to like this stuff. There are two steps to the application – 1. “I lengthen my lashes to infinity,” a white primer that came on thick and strange, and 2. “I dress my lashes divinely”, the color application. I bought the “pourpre tragique” shade, a deep and promising burgundy. Alas. I spent like twenty bucks on this mascara and it left me clumpy and disappointed. J’regrette. I’m still looking for that miracle mascara that will give me the false lashes effect to perfection.