I read this bit of gossip over at The Scoop, my weekly addiction on MSNBC’s Entertainment page. (The Scoop is written by the lovely and talented Jeannette Walls, and she is one of few gossip columnists who I believe 100% of the time).

An uncomfortable pairing?

Does Will Smith believe that filmgoers don’t want to see him getting his happiness from Cameron Diaz? The star of “The Pursuit of Happyness” is one of Hollywood’s most well-liked celebs, but a journalist claims that Smith says he wanted to co-star in a romantic comedy with the Charlie’s Angels star — but worried that the public would be uncomfortable with the interracial pairing.

“Smith, one of the world’s most bankable stars, appears mostly opposite black or Latino women,” noted U.K. writer Leslie O’Toole. “He once confided to me that he’d love to make a romantic comedy with Cameron Diaz but feared that his audience wouldn’t accept it.”

“It’s a shame, but it is what it is,” Thandie Newton, his co-star in “The Pursuit of Happyness” lamented. “I think if it was done in the right way, where race wouldn’t be an issue, it would be great. But you can’t bend people’s minds too quickly.”

I had to write about this, because it tied in perfectly with my Martin Luther King post earlier.

Am I out of the loop, or are things actually this sad?

Will Smith is a great actor. I’ve admired his skills since he was rapping with Jazzy Jeff.

Cameron Diaz isn’t my favorite actress in the world, but I do think she has an attractive on-screen presence, and notable comedic timing.

They could potentially make a funny (and profitable) romantic comedy together.

Why should it matter what race they are? “You can’t bend people’s minds too quickly,” excuse me – what year is this?

Are we as a society still not “over” interracial relationships?

My personal opinion is that love is love, if you find someone who respects your mind, respects your body, and makes you want to be with them and cherish the time spent with them, then it doesn’t matter what race or gender they are.

There isn’t enough love and committment in the world as it is, so why put limitations on who people should or shouldn’t choose to spend their lives with?

Why should I make it my business who you choose to settle down with, or who puts that special smile on your face?

But I want honest opinions here.

Tell me, if a film starring Will Smith and Cameron Diaz as a romantic couple were to be released – and the trailer looked funny – would you support it? Or would you boycott it as an act of protest against their on-screen relationship?

What are your views on interracial relations in the world in 2007?

Filed Under:


Jennifer says:
January 15, 2007, 6:22 pm
Afrobella, The only reason why it is so hard for folks to accept interracial relationships in my opinions are for two major reasons. One, America is a country built on racism, and it still survives so people are still harboring feeling of hatred. For example, the Duke Rape case was so big because "allegedly" a Black woman was gang raped by white men. It would not have received national attention if the women was white. Second, Black love and Black women being seen as desirable has not been protrayed in major films significantly. Tell me the last time you have seen a Black family movie? or Black leading couple in a movie that was positive? That's why Love Jones and Brown Suga are such popular movies amongst Black peole.
Coffy says:
January 15, 2007, 6:23 pm
Denzel Washington has also talked about this.i believe he was starring in a movie with Julia Roberts and there was some question about if they should have a love scene in the movie. Since moving to Washington State my eyes have been opened, the way i am stared at, followed and judged is bonkers. i kinda expect it from older people, but the young people are horrible. there are barely any Black people here, so i find myself constantly being the outsider, and having to educate stubborn minds. my boyfriends job moved us here, and i cannot wait until we move. oh yeah the boyfriend is Caucasian so half the damn time he doesn't even notice. life here sucks so bad.
AppleDiva says:
January 15, 2007, 6:23 pm
Afrobella, One of my new fave movies is "Something New" with Sanaa Lathan. I like the movie because it is less about dating, but more about how closed-minded we are as people. Sanaa's character had issues with race, but her friend's (can't recall her name)issue was class/socioeconomic status. The friend was not interested in dating a cook/chef, but she opened her mind and found love. Indeed, that was something new for the character. We have to open our hearts and minds to receive love. I do not want to get too personal, but my husband and I are both Black, but we are very different islands and different religious upbringings. I know a lot of people looked down on us because they thought that we were "unequally yolked." Once they get to know us as individuals, they realize that we are very decent, great people. Thanks again for the blog. I am hiatus from class, so that is why I have been responding early and often. :-D
Coffy says:
January 15, 2007, 6:25 pm
@Jennifer, the last Black movie i remember was Akeelah and the Bee, and hardly anyone went to see it.Shame on us.
crashhappy says:
January 15, 2007, 6:41 pm
Funny, I think I just re-read on some blog about Denzel "His Eternal Royal Hotness" Washington's resistance to a romantic pairing between himself and Julia Roberts in "The Pelican Brief". I wish I had the link to post, but to paraphrase, he didn't want to "disappoint" his black female fanbase by kissing Julia. That was the early 90's right? How far have we come? Fast forward to 2006, how did "Something New" fair in the box office? Oprah hyped it, I rented it, and frankly found it sweet and entertaining, dealing with interracial dating issues without sermonizing or speechifying. But did that movie even crack the top 10 opening week? I think the fear from both actors and the studios, founded or not, is akin to the whole "FUBU" debate you addressed earlier in your site. In reading a user review on IMDB.com for "Something", the poster emphasized "THIS IS NOT A BLACK MOVIE." What, exactly, does that mean? In context it was meant to encourage people to see the movie on its universal merits, but let's be real now-- I've had friends that (dis)missed some good films as "black movies" (not "For Us"), likewise some other viewers might make a snap judgement that Will stepping out with YT is definitely something they aren't down with (not "By Us" nor "For Us"), and not buy a ticket. I mean, if anyone could pull it off, it'd be Mr. Smith, because he's a worldwide superstar, and frankly I wonder how much better the aforementioned "Something" would have done if it had more starpower. Which makes me circle back and wonder, "Well, why didn't it have bigger names?" Is it that fear again, from the stars, from the studio? Ways, this post is already too long, so lemme close with "thanks" Will for bringing up the issue, and gracias for you for posting, but I worry that maybe we ain't ready-- that even in this new century we aren't as open minded as Mr. King would have hoped for us to be. 'Tho I'd love to be proven wrong on this point. :-) (Disclosure: Cameron Diaz? Ewww. Anyone but Joker McScarecrow. )
HomeSpaGoddess says:
January 15, 2007, 6:48 pm
I agree with Will. I don't want to see him in a romantic comedy with a white actress when there are plenty of black actress for the part. Yeah it's 2007, but it's hard enough to find a black man in real life, does it have to be equally hard to find one with a black woman in the movies? When white actors are paired with the same frequency to black actresses as white actresses are paired to black actors in tv and film whenever an "interracial couple" is needed, Will and Cameron can hang. Until then, I agree with Will.
Olivia says:
January 15, 2007, 7:54 pm
Its 2007, it doesn't matter. I think there should be more movies that promote 'interracial' love. But at the same time those who protest against are a bit backwards. This reminds me of that movie, can't remember the title off hand, but Ashton Kutcher and Bernie Mac was in it. I'm tired of people still having a gripe about this issue. Will and Cam could make a movie, I see it in the works, just loosen up. I'm a product of interracial love, being Jamaican, West Indian you see it all over the Caribbean. But this is a hurdle that the U.S. can't get over.
Brittany says:
January 15, 2007, 8:05 pm
I know that I wouldn't be interested in seeing a movie with Will and Cam as a couple. I'm not against interracial couples but I personally wouldn't spend my money to see that movie. Why should I when black women are shown the least amount of love and respect on the big screen.
Ami Jane says:
January 15, 2007, 8:31 pm
I don't really care about who Will Smith does his pictures with. Yes he is talented, but he is corny to me. Now, if it was Denzel (or anyone that I consider a real dude). Damnit, yes I would have a problem. I really can not tell you the exact reason why. But I do know that black people are still on the bottom here in America. I don't care what anyone says, if you are black here in America, in general we are still looked at as being worse than ANY other race. I just don't like Hollywoods propaganda. I worry about the young minds. I feel like there are just as many great black actresses out there with comedic timing. So why can't that work? Yes it is still like that in 2007. The civil rights movement was not that long ago and parents, grandparents still feel the sting from it today in MODERN times. We came quite a ways, but things aren't close to what they should be for black people here in America, because in general people still see us as inferior and in general subconciously and behind closed doors the powers that be and others treat us as such.
January 15, 2007, 8:36 pm
Carolyn says:
January 15, 2007, 10:24 pm
I don't care who anyone dates in his/her real life, but there aren't enough images of black folks loving black folks, so until there are, I'm one of those that Will rightly believes would be non-supportive. Admittedly, I have a double standard...I paid to see "something new” but that’s because I want to see black women getting some love – no matter what color the man is giving it. There’s no shortage of imagery showing white women as desirable - I don't need support that. If Will wants to do something different, how about a love story with him and a black woman who is older, or plus size, or someone darker than he? How about a woman who’s all three of those things! I’d pay to see that.
Black Honey says:
January 16, 2007, 12:28 am
I realize that this is a shortcoming on my part, but I wouldn't pay to Will Smith snuggle with Cameron Diaz. Like a lot of the posters have stated, there simply are not enough images of African Americans loving each other. There aren't enough movies with Black women as the romantic interest. Except for Halle Berry, black women aren't portrayed as the objects of desire. We can be the single mom, sister, aunt, drug addict, prostitute, doctor, lawyer, whatever, but we can't be in a loving relationship (with any man, let alone a black man). This is to be expected from mainstream media. When Black producers, directors and actors with pull start making the same choices, where does that leave black actresses? Where does that leave black women? Finally as adults, I don't think we always remember the effect media images have on young people. Let's be real, a lot of our young girls grow up in single mom homes without their mothers being in loving relationships. You take away movies and TV, they don't even have loving black relationships to dream about.
Dahls says:
January 16, 2007, 12:29 am
I agree with Carolyn there aren't enough images of happy black couples. Many Black women do not fill comfortable with the images of interracial bliss between black men and white women because they also have issue with the portrayal of black (on Black) relationships. In many cases they are ridden with stereotypes. Whether we like it or not most films are directed to certain demographics and sadly our African American demographic is at the bottom of the chain. There are few movies of substance that are marketed to us that portray us and all aspects of our daily lives in a positive light.
Tonya says:
January 16, 2007, 3:24 am
I always thought Cameron Diaz was a Latina. Anyway, I have to agree with Carolyn. Until there are more movies portraying Black women as desirable, and in a positive light, I have NO INTEREST in seeing a movie with a brother lusting after a White woman. I think both Will and Denzel are very smart for recognizing that.
Janet says:
January 16, 2007, 5:46 am
While I would still see a movie with Cameron and Will, I know i would be thinking throughout why didn't they cast a black woman. There are not enough movies with black actress in the leading role let alone in a romantic leading role.
Tai says:
January 16, 2007, 7:35 am
I definetely agree with you, but people in the world today are still as narrow-minded as ever, and will never change. Yes, this is 2007, and yes we should be over the fact that if a white and a black person want to be in a relationship, it CAN happen. I don't see the big deal. People just need to suck it up and let it happen. There's nothing really that they can do anyway. I say that if Will Smith and Cameron Diaz made a movie, I would definetely watch it. Will smith may be right, it may not be accepted by some, but it could be accepted by many.
bella says:
January 16, 2007, 8:55 am
The funny thing is, I see where ALL of you are coming from. I agree that there aren't nearly enough black women being cast as romantic leads - for some strange reason, the film Strange Days with Angela Bassett pops into my head... even though it was more of an action flick, she plays against Ralph Fiennes really well. So many great, strong black actresses can only find work as the sidekick or the comedic relief, it's frustrating. HOWEVER, this is just ONE movie I'm talking about here! One hypothetical movie out of the dozens that Will Smith (or Denzel, or name your hot black actor of choice) has made where he starred with a black actress as his leading lady. I would like to think Will Smith can step outside of the box for one flick, shake up the mainstream silver screen relationship, and then go back to being the usual goofy action hero he is without losing his fanbase. But maybe I'm wrong. I'd definitely like to see it go both ways as you were saying - see Ben Stiller cast a black actress as his wife on-screen, or Jim Carrey, or hell, even Brad Pitt or George Clooney. And Carolyn, your point is so dead on - you never see an older, still-foxy black actress in a romantic lead. Pam Grier is the only actress of that demographic I can think of, and I think she's on the L Word. But it sounds to me like you're pitching a black version of The Graduate, and that could be really awesome! Or, Harold & Maude, which would be equally interesting. I'd like to see something like that tackled by a real actress, not just some dude in a fat suit and makeup.
FenixStar says:
January 16, 2007, 1:28 pm
it's very frustrating. i get bs ALL the time about my norwegian fiancee... and i think i live in one of the most cosmopolitan places in the world, but people have assbackward views. when the film - something new - was released, it would have been a great, funny romantic comedy, but instead the obvious (the fact that he was white & blonde & she was black) was shoved down everyone's throat. the movie itself was very cute, but they wouldnt just let it be. it's too much in this country 2 just 'let things be'.
coiltastic says:
January 16, 2007, 1:39 pm
If Will was starring in a film with Cameron, both as romantic leads, I would only see it because of Cameron. I like her better than Will. But I do think he has a great point and stance on the subject. At the same time, there should be more IR relationships on screen, but like others have said, with a balance. White male actors with black females, as well. If it can't be all around fun I don't think we are ready to go there then. Also I probably wouldn't be extremely hyped about seeing these movies unless the actors were people I truly enjoyed. I am simply not that into IRs. I have never done it, so it isn't anything that I feel that is needed to speak my voice or tell my story. Just throwing in here as well, this is one of the few sites I visit of a black woman's that isn't screaming angry and putting people on the defense. This is one spot I can come and not feel challenged. It's cool here to talk without fear of a fight. Love it afrobella!!
rkj says:
January 16, 2007, 3:28 pm
I hope the same people lamenting the lack of quality black entertainment aren't the same ones watching trash like Flavor Flav's show or "I Love New York". It's bigger than Will kissing Cameron Diaz.
Joy says:
January 16, 2007, 3:36 pm
I have to admit i'm not a big fan of either actors mentionned in this conversation but although i agree that there are not nearly enough positive representations of black women in the media but some of you seem really raw about the idea of interracial couples on the screen. I am light brown and my husband is darker... and to be honest it makes me sick how the darker women sometimes look at us like " couldn't you find someone your own shade?" It's just plain ignorant. I wish we would grow into our own more as a people... And (don't shoot me for this) until the people we let represent ousrelves in the media keep playing the game like they are now ( naked girls back-popping, guys treating cars like they were women and throwing cash in the air as if it was appropriate) we can not expect people outside our ethnic group ( white yellow, or whatever) to imagine us diffferently...
Mahogany_Butterfly says:
January 16, 2007, 3:51 pm
Yes I would go see the movie if for no other reason than to support Will Smith. I think it's ironic that people see Cameron Diaz as a white woman when it has been reported that she is in fact Latina just as so many of Will Smith's other romantic interests on film. When Something New came out I know tons of black men who did not want to go see that movie. The idea of an attractive black woman being with a white man was just not something they could handle. I had to practically beg the guy I was dating at the time to go with me to see the movie and he said okay but you better not get any ideas from this movie. So yes it's still hard for many people in society to see interracial couples, whether it's in real life or onscreen. I agree that love is love regardless but as a black woman who has oftentimes felt rejected by black men for a lighter skin woman or a white woman it still stings just a little bit initially.
Coffy says:
January 16, 2007, 4:07 pm
@Joy i agree, there seems to be a lot of raw emotion on this topic. i don't feel rejected when i see a Black man with a woman of another race, because he doesn't belong to me. i wasn't raised with the idea that, "every person that shares my skintone owes me something." as an immigrant i got more grief from my own than others. Cameron Diaz is Cuban by the way. Until we get more Black and Brown screenwriters our stories will not be told,there needs to be more of us behind the scenes, instead of always cheesing for the camera.
BlackHoney says:
January 16, 2007, 4:38 pm
I noticed that a couple of posters have mentioned that Cameron Diaz is Latina. Does that make it okay?
AppleDiva says:
January 16, 2007, 4:41 pm
A latina can be white, black, or multiracial.
BlackHoney says:
January 16, 2007, 5:12 pm
I realize that Latinas can be of any race but it seems like some Latinas get a nod from black women, meaning these women aren't black, but it's okay for black men to date them. We will bitch and moan about Will or Denzel co-starring with Cameron, but give Rosalyn Sanchez, Eva Mendes or J-Lo a green light? Why is that?
jerseybred says:
January 16, 2007, 5:20 pm
I would go see a movie starring the aforementioned if I thought it would be funny. And its apparent that we all have a long way to go in terms of Interracial relationships, on screen and off.
Coffy says:
January 16, 2007, 5:36 pm
@Blackhoney i think people can get with the idea of two minorities together.it's almost as if Caucasians are the enemy, and everybody else is alright. not for nothing but if you read the news coming out of California you will see that the Latin and Black community are in a war.don't want to get to deep into it but race riots are coming soon.
BlackHoney says:
January 16, 2007, 5:44 pm
@Coffy: In California, I think is Willie Lynch is in action. As soon black and brown folk in Cali realize that, things will cool down.
BlackHoney says:
January 16, 2007, 5:44 pm
that is "I think Willie Lynch is in action".
Coffy says:
January 16, 2007, 6:02 pm
@BlackHoney,they sure are helping his agenda. i tell people all the time that if it were up to some, there would be no minorities, except Asian. which is why to me when the immigration issue comes up, i can't help but think that if they could we(Black people)would be kicked out the country also.we cannot wait until something directly pertains to us to get involved.
Niki says:
January 16, 2007, 6:13 pm
I agree with the posters here who have said that there are not enough interesting leading roles for black actresses--that's why I was so happy about Sanaa Lathan when she was on 'Nip/Tuck" (one of my favorite shows) this past season because she was allowed to play a multi-layered woman, not a "boring black superwoman" or the "sassy black friend with no business of her own". I just started watching a new drama on the Family Cahnnel (of all places) called "Lincoln Heights". It is about a black L.A. family of 5--the dad is a cop, mom is a medical assistant, and their two teenage daughters and preteen son. The dad participates in a program to get cops to move back to the inner city and he renovates a delapidated house and moves his kids & wife (who just know the 'burbs) back to the hood where he came from. I am loving the entire family, especially the chocolate brown sista who plays the wife--an image you don't see much on TV these days. On the issue of Will & Cameron, I think it's just a matter of $$. The studio heads think that it would be too "risky" to pair them onscreen despite Will & Cameron's likeabilty and marketability. In a society where less copies of a fashion magazine are sold with a black model on the cover rather than white, this isn't suprising. If the movie was good, I would support it. I agree with Bella that it should work both ways--let Brad Pitt or Matthew McCoughnahey's movie girlfriends/wives be black (Brad & Matt have dated black women in real life). I am in an interacial relationship myself (my sweetie's white) these past 2 years and I have been dating interaccially on and off before in my life and I haven't had any really negative reaction. I have had a couple of friends ask me goofy questions they wouldn't dare ask me if my man was black, but that was the extent of it.
AppleDiva says:
January 16, 2007, 6:39 pm
Niki, When I read about the show, I assumed it was a white family. I got a free download of the first episode, and I was quite pleased with the show. The show is now on my DVR record schedule. I was pleasantly surprised to see a Black family as the center of the story lines.
AppleDiva says:
January 16, 2007, 6:45 pm
Blackhoney, You bring up an interesting point about the "pass" that Black women give to other non-European women. Is it that we feel kinship with certain other groups? Let me know your thoughts.
Nikki says:
January 16, 2007, 7:15 pm
AppleDiva, I think the reason some Black women give the "other" women a pass is because they are minority and somehow can relate to the struggles of being a minority in the United States. Thats what I hear from my friends.BUt I don't know??? One of my girlfriends is dating a Puerto Rican guy who looks like Jon B, however she told that if he was a white guy who looked exactly like her current guy, that she couldn't be in a relationship with him because she thinks they would have nothing in common. SHe based this all off apperence, not what the White guy could possibly be bringing to the table. I think that thats crazy. I'm an equal opportunity dater. If you got it going on I don't care what you look like. But I think that has a lot to do with the way I was brought up. My family is Trinidadian so is hard for me not to see all colors and races for who they are and not what they look like.
Dani says:
January 16, 2007, 7:43 pm
I don't know. I could argue a lot of sides to this sentiment. On the one hand, I don't care about inter-racial dating. If you're lucky enough to find someone who will support you, understand you, care about you and put up with all your BS and you're willing to do the same, color just doesn't matter. On the other hand, Black relationships/Black love are either completely ignored by entertainment media or devalued, vilified or shown as completely dysfunctional. So I could see why some people might take issue with Will Smith starring in some lame romantic comedy with Cameron Diaz (who's half Cuban but whatever) as opposed to Sanaa Lathan or Kerry Washington (an aside: isn't she just FLAWLESS no matter where and when you see her?!). Then again, this nation really hasn't come that far regarding race relations. We've just gotten better at sticking our heads in the sand and sweeping everything under the rug but race relations is still a huge hurdle in our society that I'm not sure we're ever going to get to the point where color doesn't matter and the person does. (Sorry for the long-winded post.)
AppleDiva says:
January 16, 2007, 7:45 pm
Nikki, I feel the same way as you. When I came to this country, I lived in a mostly White immigrant community. I had a lot of White friends because we all understood each other. It wasn't utopia, but it was cool. It was not until I moved into mostly Black area, I had problems. I was always never "Black" enough. By the time I got to high school, I realized that the only way to live my life was to appreciate my difference and to appreciate the differences in other people.
AppleDiva says:
January 16, 2007, 7:50 pm
Dani, I agree. I know the discussion is interracial dating, but the topic is about race relations. I have been listening to some Black people on progressive talk radio saying how Barack Obama is not Black enough because he is bi-racial, and he does not understand the struggles of being a Black man in American. Oh, I think he understands the struggle. When are we going to quite talking that mess.
BlackHoney says:
January 16, 2007, 8:20 pm
@apple Diva In some ways there is a kinship. I think that there are things that all minorities in the US experience (being reminded of your race everyday, expectations based on stereotypes, etc). As far as IR relationships in movies and TV I think Will and Dnezel are pulling the ookie-doke. In the media (and in real life), there are some black women (BW) who are happy as long as the black man’s love interest isn’t a white woman (WW). I find that odd and in some ways hypocritical. We say that we oppose on-scene interracial relationships (IRR) between black men (BM) and WW because there aren’t enough loving relationships between BM and BW shown. How does Will or Denzel making out with a racially ambiguous Latina promote Black love? How does Wesley making out with Ming-Na show black love? How about Taye Diggs and that woman on Daybreak? We say we oppose BM/WW on-scene IRR because BW aren’t presented as physically desirable but we have no problem with fair or tan Latinas being the love interest. Note that either Will or Denzel made movies with actresses like Gina Torres or Zoe Saldana or Lauren Valdez or Rosie Perez (Latinas with distinctly African features) as the love interest. It’s always actresses like J-Lo, Eva Mendes and Rosalyn Sanchez: women who are a little too dark to be white but too white to be to be black, have European features (who can pass for dark Italians or Greeks) and have long straight hair. A male friend of mine refers to them as having “booties like sistahs, but with white skin and “good” hair.” Tell me how Will slobbering down a woman like Eva Mendes supposed to promote BW as being physically desirable? If you can give Will, Denzel, Taye and Wesley a pass for Latinas and Asian chicks, it seems strange to me that you would complain about white chicks like Julia Roberts. There is nothing about the IRR with those other minority women that’s different than a relationship with a white woman. That’s just my two cents.
BlackHoney says:
January 16, 2007, 8:53 pm
There are several issues with Obama: 1) The issue that some African Americans have with Barack Obama is that his success story is essentially an immigrant’s story like Gov. Arnold’s. Believe me your outlook of life in the US will be completely different if you or your family came to the States by choice to build a better life than if you were born Black in America. Where are you supposed to go if you wanted a better life? What are you supposed to do? You were born in the greatest country in the school but if you don't have any money odds are you won't receive a decent education. Without an education what are going to do? 2) Obama isn’t a direct product of the Civil Rights struggle of the 50’s and 60’s. As a person who grew up in Alabama and who was raised by people who grew up in the segregated South, who marched, and still carry those scars, trust that my outlook of life in the US is completely different from someone who has had no direct relationship to that. 3) Finally, I read somewhere that white people like Obama because he isn’t angry. That’s two red flags. He’s seen as a good Negro (i.e Condi and Clarence Thomas) and not being the least bit angry. My god, hasn't he been profiled? Pulled over for no reason? Followed in a shop?
AppleDiva says:
January 16, 2007, 9:33 pm
Blackhoney, Respectfully, don't you he was targeted in his community for being biracial or Black. Don't you think when he was running around with his friends, the police harassed him more than his friends. I think native born Blacks feel that they are the ones that feel that cut of racism, but all Black people do. I believe that generally no one likes Black people of any group (African American, West Indian, or African) and within our group we have issues with each other. Black Americans think that no one else can understand their pain, but you know what all Black people (and other people of color) know about struggle. We understand that it can be difficult, but one still has to persevere . Bite your tongue for putting Dr. Rice, Clarence Thomas and Barack Obama in the same sentence :D. They grew up doing during that time, and they have the "bootstrap" mentality. Yes, it is up to help yourself, but we do not do this alone. There are people to help us along the way. I digress. For argument sake, let's Barack Obama (who is light-skinned with 2 Black parents) was from Jamaica or Trinidad, or another island, would he be acceptable under these conditions? What some people don't understand is that the struggles in America are not as harsh as struggles in the other part of the world i.e. Africa. Families have to pay for their children to attend school. In America that is not the case. Not until there is a grass roots effort by parents in this country to fix school, there will be no political will to do so. Ultimately, parents have to value education to help their children have access to supplemental education.
Black Honey says:
January 16, 2007, 11:43 pm
AppleDiva, We all bring our past experiences to the table. I have felt in the past that I have been looked down upon by Africans and West Indians so of course that is going to color my view about issues like this. In the US, we are taught black is black and it has always hurt to have someone from Africa or the Caribbean stare at me for 20 minutes obviously trying to figure out where I was from, only to walk away when I introduce myself and they hear my southern accent. I wouldn't be surprised if Obama has been harassed but I truly believe but because he's never said anything about it to my knowledge makes me wonder his feelings about racial profiling and defense mechanisms that develop as a response to those everyday injustices. If Obama was from the Caribbean, I wouldn't doubt his ability as a leader or his vision for America but I would wonder if he truly spoke for me and "felt my pain". I don't think that a lot of Black immigrants truly appreciate the diversity of the the Black experience in the US. The face of abject poverty in the US is not restricted to the inner city. At least in places like Philly you can work in McDonalds. The poverty that existed before Katrina is not rare. I suggest you look up stats like for places like the Black Belt in AL (where i grew up) and the Mississippi Delta. I'm sure they rival those of any Caribbean nation. There is little or no industry. You have to car pool an hour or so to to work and shop (no public transportation). The average family income for blacks averages between $12000 to $15000. The school systems are still segregated by race. White students attend private school paid by their families (who still own a majority of the land). Black students attend poorly funded public schools (low income and low revenue from businesses and low income taxes) where some teachers do their jobs, but a majority don't. Every parent I knew encouraged their children to pursue their educations, and made sure their children had what they needed and sometimes that the children of others had what they needed. (this is why I really get ticked when people say that African Americans don't value education.) A grass roots effort has always existed to give black children a better education (brown vs BOE). I don't think anyone ever predicted how far people would go to maintain the status quo. I know for a fact that in AL there won't be an equitable educational system until white people can't afford to send their children to private schools and don't have enough money to move. I wrote all of this to say until a candidate, any candidate, convinces me that he understands my experience, I can't vote for him and I don't care where he's from.
Queen of all Mojo says:
January 17, 2007, 12:42 am
No, i wouldn't pay money to see movie starring Will Smith and Cameron Diaz. Black women are deemed inferior in America. White women have always been placed into the media as the ultimate mate. As, much as we like to think that everyone can not be influenced by the media but it is far from the truth.
Megan says:
January 17, 2007, 12:21 pm
The biggest issue in my opinion is why he doesn't seem to want an African-american as his co-star. These talented women are struggling to get roles and he wants Cameron Diaz???? I would love to see him and Nia Ling re-unite.
Megan says:
January 17, 2007, 12:25 pm
*Long Can we fix the unity in our own race first before we try to fix it with "others".
Julia_Claudine_Deveraux says:
January 17, 2007, 1:06 pm
My stance on this issue is there are not enough big budget movies with two African American leads. Usually if the leading man is African American, they pair him up with a woman of questionable heritage, like it's a sin to cast two brown people as a couple. Every other race gets paired up together but Blacks. I'm tired of seeing it and I no longer support films like that. I am not a Will Smith movie fan, I find him rather corny and commercial. I dig him as a person, but not as an actor. He knows the bottom line is money and he knows Cameron Diaz is a box-office draw.
AppleDiva says:
January 17, 2007, 1:13 pm
Blackhoney, I used to work as a teacher. The kids who did well in school, their parents worked with them at home. These children were far from rich. We did not always see that. I know it is hard for a lot of people because they have to work multiple jobs, but people have to create partnerships in the community. The churches have to step up. I read an article in Essence a few years back about a mother who, along with some other parents, helped her children's school go from worst to first. That is what I mean by grassroots level. We have to start doing it ourselves, because there is no political will for change. Racism boils down to economics. The less we know, the less we get paid, which means we will live in bad areas. We have to see the struggle about economic empowerment because equality is somewhat hard to obtain. I know Black tenured professors who are mistaken for the teaching assistants. They keep pushing, they keep doing. It is hard out here for all Black people. ->Megan, Daps to you for speaking the truth :D
Coffy says:
January 17, 2007, 1:53 pm
from a studio position a movie with two Black people in the lead is seen as a "Black movie", and not seen as a money maker. Jennifer Lopez has also made a stink about this issue. she wanted to play opposite Benjamin Bratt, but the studio heads said no because it would be seen as a Latino movie. not until we are tell our own stories will they get the attention they deserve
girl stop says:
January 17, 2007, 3:19 pm
Didn't Taye Diggs and Idina Menzel receive death threats after they married (she was still on Broadway) just a couple years ago? The general public isn't going to embrace that. Even though my partner is white (so I have no problem with an interracial relationship), my immediate reaction is, "why is the black woman being overlooked again?" More than anything, it's always the black woman who's out-of-a-job, off-the-screen, out-of-sight. That's how it happens--no one ever says "let's replace the black male actor with a white one" but somehow women are supposed to be interchangeable.
Isis says:
January 17, 2007, 4:18 pm
Well I went out my first date with a white guy the other night,,,,he was charming and I will be seeing him again...I use to have hang ups about interracial dating..but we live and hopefully grow..and part of my growth has been that..how a person treats you and makes you feel...is more important than the color of skin..love is a gift that comes in all shapes..colors and sizes,,,Thanks Ms.Bella for your thought provoking questions !
LBellatrix says:
January 17, 2007, 5:18 pm
IR relationships in real life: I only have a problem when someone says that they date "out" because ALL women of their race are X or ALL men of their race are Y. People who say such things are bigots and should be treated accordingly (ie. ignored). If you're going to go "out," do it because you genuinely love and care for the person and not for what that person represents in a race-polarized society. IR relationships onscreen: Normally I'm okay with them but yeah, I'm past ready for seeing more black women in IRs onscreen. But how many black actresses do you think feel the same way as Will and Denzel: oh, we have to show love for the black man? (I for one would be interested in a poll on that. Any Essence staff checking this out? Go ask today's leading black actresses if they feel they should insist on starring opposite a black man in romantic relationships. Early prediction: Most of them will say "Hell no!" and I have no problem with that.) This particular pairing (Will and Cameron): Uh, no. Not really feeling them together at all. And unless I'm mistaken, NOBODY makes note of Cameron's Latina (or half-Latina, or whatever) heritage as a general rule, so why do we make note of it now? For all intents and purposes, she's white, so we should just leave it at that. Finally, I'm past ready for black women to quit feeling like we have to compete with other women for scraps. I'm waiting for black women to stop sniping at these other women and uncover our true grace and strength and beauty, the kind that would shine out naturally if we weren't so preoccupied with fighting/imitating these others. We have this "image" that in reality covers a deep sense of inferiority and alienation, and I wish we could get to the root of that so we can evolve into the kinds of beings that all people (and certainly all men) would want to be near. (Sorry for the novel.)
Niki says:
January 17, 2007, 5:45 pm
Preach on Bellatrix! As wonderful as we are, we black women have our "issues" (understandably!) It's not until we deal with them that we will stop having this inferiority complex that mainstream (read:white) society and even our own TV shows, discussions, and publications (I wanted to throw every issue of that Essence cover a few years ago with the story "Do Black Men Still Want Us?" off the newstand and in the trash can!) gives to most of us. I am a black woman with a lot to be proud of and I won't wallow in the self-pity that American seems happy to let us get swallowed up by. I left that self-pity stuff behind as soon as I left my 20s 2 1/2 years ago. It's hard sistas, but we come from strong stuff!
Dj says:
January 17, 2007, 5:59 pm
i have no problem at all with interracial relationships, simply because i am in one. Will Smith did star with a white woman in Bad Boys I. They were kinda romantically involved but the movie wasn't about their relationship per se. Denzel was in a romantic movie a long time ago with an Indian woman. I loved that movie because it really showed how culture and class plays a big role in the way people view each other. Anyways I would go see the movie if it was made. People need to stop being afraid of change.
Coffy says:
January 17, 2007, 6:14 pm
you better preach LBellatrix, girl you are bringing the church up in here.pass the collection plate.
Megan says:
January 17, 2007, 6:16 pm
Bella... That's the truth girl! That's why IR relationships won't be fully be accepted because you have those idiots who get into them for the wrong reasons and disrespect people because of THEIR skin color and expect you to respect them.
TheMakeupGirl says:
January 18, 2007, 11:53 am
WAIT WAIT WAIT!! Cameron Diaz is second generation Cuban American and German (mixed) so what is the big deal here? Is it because she looks white?
amokaqt says:
January 18, 2007, 1:07 pm
I have too much to say and too little time. I haven’t read all the posts yet and decided to post mine before I was influenced by the others. My take is that the movie (which I have already seen) would have gone TOTALLY different if Diaz were opposite of Will Smith for the simple fact that it wouldn't be believable. Could you see Cameron Diaz in Thandie Newton's shoes playing that role to the full effect that she did? No. Do you think she would have had the "attitude" that was needed to "portray" the head-swiveling, finger-waving, "what is we gon' do" stereotypical struggling minority in America? Do you think America is ready to see an actress like Cameron Diaz in an interracial relationship, be the person who walks out on her husband and child because she couldn't hack it? HIGHLY unlikely. OH and just caught a glimpse of the post above me (darn) Yes it is because she "looks" white she gets to take part in receiving "hatred" that people have for interracial relationships as well as a member of this skewed society, will she take part in the benefits of being white in America and in many other countries just by the way she looks on the outside. I have nothing against interracial relationships as I am in one myself but I have a problem with the fact that many darker black women aren't playing opposite of male actors as respectable, dependable, and beautiful with sex appeal. It's NOT that common, I don't see many raising a fit about that, and it's funny how some people will run to defend a topic like this yet criticize a black actor who would turn down an offer to act opposite a white female in order to work with someone more his taste or belief. I believe in everyone getting along "one world" motto but don’t further push yourselves out of Hollywood by speaking for a cause that really doesn't bring you and your beautiful kinky, curly, brown-skinned beautiful self above and beyond. This is merely just a side to the main dish of what's really going on.
amokaqt says:
January 18, 2007, 1:18 pm
And just to lighten up things a little: Will...come on don't start the crybaby "I want to be a part of changing the world's view on interracial dating" when your own black women can barely get in the door of a film agent if they don’t pass the paper bag test! If you wanted a chance to work with Diaz you should began with something more like Hitch where she would have been the one interested in you, the date maker and instead you fix her up with someone that is just right for her in the long run instead of the "new flavor" concept that many people seem to have when it comes to interracial dating. Attack that issue. THE END. Everyones happy...roll credits.
Leah says:
January 18, 2007, 2:25 pm
I agree with so many of the posts. In my heart I feel that people should be with whomever they want to be with-white, grey, blue or pink. But, as an American of African descent female I get sick and tired of seeing the brothers with white women. The man can be as "successful" as all get out, but he seems to still feel he's nothing without that white trophy. It gets on my nerves (and yes I am one of the lucky ones-I have been in a monogamous relationship for the past 16 years). I am glad Denzel and Will feel the way they do. And please, Cameron Diaz. There are so many better white actresses than her-Angelina Jolie, Reese Witherspoon and Kate Winslet are all better actors than she is (IMHO). Also ,why does it have to be somene young-what about Susan Sarandon, Judi Dench, Meryl Streep. Aim high Will, aim high.
Honee says:
January 18, 2007, 3:42 pm
I just don't get why Will is so fixated on doing a movies with women of other colors. First, he was begging Jlo to do a movie with him and evidently she declined. He does Hitch with Eva Mendez and made a scene at every promotional stop for the movie and now he's crying about Cameron Diaz. I just don't get why he and so many other black actors don't feel validated unless they can act opposite a non-black woman.
Megan says:
January 19, 2007, 1:21 am
Honee exactly. Folks are so worried about why people have problems with him wanting to do movies with women of other races when the biggest issue is why he doesn't feel a black woman is good enough for his movie. I'm kinda bothered with Will right now.
R.E. says:
January 19, 2007, 1:01 pm
Okay. "White Women (latinos and light skinned blacks) are the most beautiful women in the universe. Black women (or dark skin)are ugly and there should be some some sort of genocide to wipe it out of existance". This is how the Black man feels. It's not just as simple as "love is love" and "it doesn't matter". it's great to think that interracial dating is all candy gumdrops, but it's not. The reason behind such love is not. If a black man has a White women that means he has accomplished something in life. it's like we are not good enough and white women will sho' nuff throw it in your face as well.And did anyone notice that when ppl refer to interacial dating it = black man, white woman? U hardly ever see the opposite because most black women think differently about the issue, we know better ( not to mention that white men find black women totally repulsive). And please dont talk about that damn movie Guess Who to argue my statement because that girl in the movie isn't even black in real life, she's latino, she was also in Drumline ( they have latino women playing black women roles! as if there aren't any wonderful black actresses. WTF!! Christina Milian=love don't cost a thing. yep. playin a black girl)I'm not crazy about seeing interracial love movies because of what it represents, self hatred and the color complex that dated back to slavery. It makes me feel like shit.
Coffy says:
January 19, 2007, 4:32 pm
*observation* When a person judges others(strangers)they really tell on themselves,especially with the language they use, and the conclusions they come up with.
afrobella says:
January 19, 2007, 5:16 pm
Wow. Coffy, I totally know what you're saying. I knew this post would create a discussion, but this is more than I anticipated. I gotta read ALL of these and dissect quite a bit before I comment further. But real quick, for the record, RE - your statement, "most black women think differently about the issue, we know better ( not to mention that white men find black women totally repulsive)" ... I can't get behind that. I know many women (and men! White men, too) who would respectfully disagree. You can't make a generalization like that. Or rather, you can, but you'd be totally wrong.
Coffy says:
January 19, 2007, 5:43 pm
one of the things i did to change myself was to stop saying/referring to things as all or every. the other thing i did was to stop jumping to conclusions(making up stories) to fit my jacked up thinking. before those changes i had an opinion, that i labeled as fact, about every damn thing. now i can look at things and say although it looks a certain way, that could be me filtering it the way i want to see it.
Regirl says:
January 20, 2007, 3:03 am
So, maybe this view will be appreciated...I'm white and I'm not completely comfortable with black guys that date white women either!!! I have a (white) friend who is dating a black guy and he is. totally. using. her. I can't help but think that because she is white, he doesn't see her as a 3-dimensional woman. And let me tell you, he will never marry her. And she is too...shall we say, naive?...to see it. In the black man-trophy white girl situation - the white girl loses too. She doesn't have someone who loves her for who she is. Okay, cry (us) a river, right? It's nothing compared to racism but it still sucks for her! Somewhat ironcially, I think more black women should date white men. And I know plenty of guys who would be very willing!!
Coffy says:
January 20, 2007, 10:29 pm
@ Regirl are you not comfortable with the idea in general or the man involved with your friend? if your description of the boyfriend is accurate, then isn't it a blessing he won't marry her? your friend may be the type to be taken advantage of by any man, and it just so happens right now the dude is Black.
Regirl says:
January 21, 2007, 4:06 am
Well, Coffy, you are definitely right about the marriage thing - it is a blessing he won't marry her. I'm not against interracial relationships - just black men who date white women *because* they are white. To me, this is another form of using people. You know, I guess this can happen in any number of pairings (I'm sure black women can be dated just because of their race), but I do think there is something to the white trophey thing. If that is not the case, great! Um...and she is kind of the type to be taken advantage of. Which sucks. But he still shouldn't use her! You know, she's my friend, I love her. I guess this doesn't have to do much with race, it's just that someone is stringing her along who doesn't really like who she is as a person.
queengeminii says:
January 21, 2007, 11:09 pm
I have read most of the replies to the Will& Cammy issue. I think it is a Criing Shame. The one time I went to see Wil in a movie was Enemy of the Sate,opposite Regina King. Only because they were two Black people acting togather=good,I feel that we= True Black Women, are getting pushed farther and farther back from the prospect table as far as dating, marriage, I have been talking about this for YEARS I feel no one wants US any more, They=Black Men, don't find us attractive , They will (FIND) anything else BUT a TBW, it is so sad that what was good enough for our Fathers, Grandfathers and Uncles it is not good enough for these Watered down Black Men who are not able to stand up and be (DIFFERENT). No I see enough interacial couples every where I go flaunting it in OUR faces with Sarcatic Smirks and smiles like Chesshire Cats, I sure in the Hell am not going to give my hard earned Pennies on a Movie that does'nt depict some body I can relate to such actresses of color Loretta Devine, Sam L. Jacksons wife, and Monique just to name a few, not to mention the new Jennifer Hudson, all these women can ACT so stand up Black america and stop letting Hollywood tell us what is funny, artistic and meaningful for OUR society and OUR Youth,We are raising OUR future.
queengeminii says:
January 21, 2007, 11:29 pm
To just re-ply to all of the readers out there I am a light-skinned Black Women born to a very Dark skinned Woman who just happened to have had a white father, Iam also married to a Black Man and have been for years. So I am not Bitter & alone. I just see a need to address the issue at hand on a level that might not have crossed the majorities mind.
beautyinbaltimore says:
January 22, 2007, 2:17 am
I'm ubdecided on this issue. I think Cameron is a good comedic actress but at the same time I want to see more roles with loving black families.
Coffy says:
January 22, 2007, 2:43 pm
i can understand not wanting to see a mixed race couple on the big screen, but i think we should also take a closer look at movies that portray us (Black women)poorly. Martin Lawrence and Eddie Murphy are laughing all the way to the bank,portraying us as obese,uneducated country bumpkins.
Honee says:
January 23, 2007, 1:55 pm
Coffy, I'm so with you on that point. I'm so tired of these movies. I'm just so tired of seeing us disrespected by men and we don't say a mumbling word. Because we have to support them or they might stop liking/loving us. Yet, we attack each other (women) like rabid animals. Ugh!
Coffy says:
January 23, 2007, 2:25 pm
@Honee,i was surprised at the reactions to this post, but i wonder how many of these women support Eddie Murphy and Martin Lawrence movies. in my opinion their caricatures of us (Black women), are far more hurtful and destructive to us and our image. if you watch commercials how many Black women are overweight compared to caucasian women. can you imagine a caucasian comedian doing the movies that Eddie and Martin are doing? no way it aint gonna happen.
Honee says:
January 23, 2007, 5:01 pm
I wasn't very surprised about the reactions to the post. I've become use to many of us subtracting the person that is actually committing the action and blaming Hollywood, white men, and non-black women and/or black women with fairer complexions for the issues facing black women. All Will, Martin and Eddie have to do is go on Oprah or appear on the cover of Essence cheesing really hard and say I LOVE BLACK WOMEN. We eat up everytime.
Coffy says:
January 23, 2007, 5:21 pm
Honee, i'm totally with you.
Victoria says:
January 24, 2007, 1:59 pm
I think until afro-americans start respecting each other and themselves there will always be racism, at least in US. Most of them are "hating on" those that accomplished smth or have a better car, shoes, bling-bling, etc. I see it all the time. My husband's ex-wife has a sign on her car "This car is surrounded by haters", what kind of sign it is to put on one's car! Black people don't help each other, you won't see that in almost any other race. Latinos always prefer to do business with other, give each other better deals as far as cars, rent, even food and other things, so do Asians and Armenians and Jews and Russians in US, but not black people, they'd rather see their friend down or do "drive bys" or kill each other for a little bit of money or weed. Our friend got killed recently that way, and he didn't have more than 20 bucks worth of weed on him... And I see young and older people get killed because of all this "gangbanging" at least coupe of times a year. I think black celebrities can make a huge difference, but most of them don't do anything. They'd rather wear thousand of dollars worth of jewelry and clothes and have dozens of cars. Look at BET awards, have you seen white celebrities wear at least half as much jewelry!? If they spend less money on themselves and more money on communities they were raised in there would be much less poverty and issues to deal with! Instead of that they disrespect black women (and all women!) in their songs, videos and movies and boast how much money they have. Snoop Dogg, Jay-Z, 50 Cents ... all of them. Snoop Dogg prefers to spend thousands of dollars on custom paint job for his cars and diamond football rings for all the kids on his kids' football team and most of them are white and all of them are VERY rich, but he'd rather show all of their white parents how cool and rich he is than go back to Long Beach (where he's from) and help his own people! Rappers have most influence on young black people today. I'm personally in an interracial relationship. I'm white (I'm russian) and my husband is black. We've been together for 4 years and next month is our 1st year wedding anniversary. We live in Cali, Downey and my husband grew up in Compton - a very bad neighborhood for those who don't know. I'm not rich, so the idea that my husband got married to me because of my money is ridiculous, he's not rich either. We're together because we love each other and nothing else. My family has absolutely no problem with my choice, they are happy that i'm happy. My husband's family did not like me at first but after they got to know me better they realized that's it's really not about skin color. I'm in a great relationship with all of them, including his ex-wife (and - no, he did not divorce her to marry me, they go divorced 8 years before we even met!) and 2 of his kids. I didn't see a lot of negativity regarding our relationship, but still when we first started to date I noticed stares from both white and black people. I've noticed it all change too though, most white people, at least here in LA, don't care anymore, black people for the most part either, even though I have to admit black women sometimes do seem to be a little stirred. And one more thing, I see a lot of mixed couples now, black men/white women and white man/back women! This is why I love Los Angeles! Because people here are more open minded. My husband's sister live in Baltimore and when we visited her we've seen much more surprised and weird glances there then here and most of them were from white people. I didn't like it. I have great love for black people. I consider them very smart and strong race. And I feel pain when I see discrimination towards them, but I also feel pain when I see they don't want to help each other. I'm not trying to say they owe anything to each other, but still I believe until they become "one" they will not to be able to accomplish everything they are trying to accomplish. And I wouldn't see any problems with seeing Will Smith in a movie with Cameron Diaz or any other black actor or actress in a movie with a white actor or actress. Until black people stop caring about it too there will always be racism! Same goes for white people. :)
whatever says:
January 24, 2007, 3:08 pm
Thanks Victoria for generalizing all blacks.Glad to know your Russian with a black husband as opposed to grade A racist American white and a significantly better wife than his hater obsessed black wife. Given the shambles Russia is in maybe you guys could move there and give inspirational lectures to your comrades about money and food and the like or if international travel is not your thing, we could have Vicky the Russian's (who although not American is still Caucasian and thus benefits)Guide to How to be a Better Black Person. Being a black female and having been in an IR, I can say that white, latin, and asian women can be just as rude and nasty when they see you with one of those men. Not to mention the insecurity and defensiveness of some of these women with black men. But hey they are just being individual women you know not part of the homogenuous black female mob mentality. I am very tired of everyone overexaggerating the reactions of black females to IRs to alleviate their own particular biases. Besides it's easier to try to pressure all these evil black b****, instead of attacking the white supremacist system or racist ass acquaintances. Adult Black women make up an insignificant number of the population so if black men fail at their film, political, and/or acting careers, it's not on us. I am tired of being blamed for their failure and an afterthought in their success. Can't have it both ways.
lauren says:
January 24, 2007, 3:45 pm
I feel no qualms about not seeing any movie of men who expect loyal support from black women yet choose other women as their leading ladies. Denzel, Will are at the point where they can have some say over their costars. Lesser actors have done it- refuse to play in a movie if they can't get a certain leading lady. Sex symbols are sex symbols because their fans think the person is sexually attractive and the fans can fantasize that the actor/actress would find them sexually attractive. With Will begging every nonblack female in the wood for play, how are his black female fans to react? These actors don't get it. White, Asian, Latin women do not have to sit through life looking in magazines, newspapers, music videos, news reports, real life, and so forth constantly being told they don't make the grade. If black men spent an iota of the time, they spend chasing and uplifting other females on black women especialy their own daughters, ....................
Coffy says:
January 24, 2007, 4:06 pm
@Victoria, i think maybe your message didn't come across the way you wanted not because of your intent but your wording.
Victoria says:
January 24, 2007, 5:57 pm
I wasn't talking about Russians being better. If we were so much better and Russia was so much better I wouldn't be in US. I didn't say that all black women are bad wives and b****, i ca give you plenty of examples of bad russian wives and white american... I didn't say that ALL black women are b*** either! Where did you read that at! if you didn't notice other people on this forum spoke about black women not liking black men other races too, so i just agreed with it! I didn't say all black women are like that and I didn't even say most black women are like that. And i'm not trying to be opposed to my husband ax-wife. I still don't think it's a nice thing to put a sign that "this car is surrounded by haters" on your car. Especially if it's a lady. I think people should look at life as positive as they can (as thus glass is half full as opposed to being half empty), and that is not a positive sign to post on someone's car! But anyway, if I hurt someone's feelings or insulted someone I apologize, as this was not my intention....
Coffy says:
January 24, 2007, 6:16 pm
@ Victoria, i think some people have a problem hearing criticism about "Black issues", from anyone that is not Black. for the record you made some good points, ones that i know that have been said by other Black folk. maybe next time you should start with "don't shoot the messenger".lol
whatever says:
January 24, 2007, 7:26 pm
I am just tired of white people who think they can tell blacks how to do it better, especially when they try to use a black or other spouse to imply they are not racist and talk about her great love of blacks. Like I said if Russians work so well together and Armenians etc. why are their countries in shambles. It's easy to sit around and imply that all black people don't try when you are not black and benefit from white privilege and all that entails. Just because black people pull each other's coat doesn't mean a white woman married to a black man can join in the condemnation. She should make sure any kids she has follow her path; but hey she can call them biracial and continue to stereotype blacks. She also acts as if only black women act nasty. Having dated IR, I can say white, Asian and Latin women can act just as nasty, but they are accorded individuality in that regard.
whatever says:
January 24, 2007, 7:29 pm
Intentions do not matter. My current is white, I don't go around telling white people or women how to be better. This is part of the problem I have with some whites they lay up with a minority and suddenly have the key to issues that have been plaguing the community for decades. Yes, I have dumped white and other dudes for talking in this manner.
bella says:
January 24, 2007, 8:13 pm
Whoa, whoa, whoa. I didn't realize that this discussion was still going on to this level. Apparently, like Nate Dogg and Warren G, I'm gonna have to regulate. Victoria, I appreciate your views and I did not read your opinions as intentionally insulting at all. And Whatever, that statement "why don't you go back..." there is no place for that kind of statement on my site. First of all, I'm not from this country so those statements strike a very particular chord with me. Another thing, we're a crowd of mostly black people having a cordial discussion, so telling someone they should "go back to their country" shouldn't even enter into the discussion given the history of our own people. NOW. Victoria, I also see Whatever's point in that your previous comment can be seen as a very sweeping generalization. I wouldn't put a sticker like that on my car, and I agree that many rappers do seem to frivolously spend their money. And the black-people-not-helping-other-black-people aspect... I just had this conversation with a black co-worker, who was lamenting a similar incident where she felt that she had been discriminated against by our own people. It does happen, but I am happy to say, it hasn't been my general experience. I believe that there are good people out there, of all colors. Like Whatever said, I too am tired of people presenting black women as an ignorant mob. It is up to us to take control of our image and make the change.
Coffy says:
January 24, 2007, 8:57 pm
*off topic* your intention creates your reality,peace.
kindanice says:
January 25, 2007, 11:59 am
I don't have a problem with it per say. I just feel that their are 2 many black Hollywood actresses that are out of work or have limited opportunites. When Hollywood features Nia long co-staring with Bradd Pitt more often, then I would have NO problem. But Why is it that WE always have to break the color barrier. It always come off as a black man chasing a white woman. Say what u will, but most of America just won't support that. Ask Tay Diggs. kind.
Neosoulbeauty says:
January 25, 2007, 1:11 pm
To be quite honest, it's just a movie. I respect Will Smith's decision and that's all that needs to be respected. Answering your question bella, I wouldn't mind seeing the movie. However, I believe that black love should be preserved. BLACK IS BEAUTIFUL!
dragoness says:
January 26, 2007, 2:35 pm
This may have been said already but one of the main reasons he is so bankable is along with his talent he is one of the most none threatening black man on the planet. If he starts appearing in movies with a white leading lady it's not his black fans he has to worry about (ok yeah but not just us) but also his white fans (males) who now see him as a threat. To this day there are very few white men who feel comfortable seeing a white woman on the arm of a black man period.
sblackwell says:
February 4, 2007, 2:49 pm
I feel the same as a lot of others who have posted on this topic. It's bad enough we can't have our history taught on a regular basis is schools and also the fact that racism is still a heavy issue in our society, but do we also have to give up our identity on film as well? We see plenty of interracial couples on the street everyday. Let us have something.
sb says:
February 4, 2007, 2:50 pm
I feel the same as a lot of others who have posted on this topic. It's bad enough we can't have our history taught on a regular basis is schools and also the fact that racism is still a heavy issue in our society, but do we also have to give up our identity on film as well? We see plenty of interracial couples on the street everyday. Let us have something.
jane says:
February 16, 2007, 2:31 pm
the big problem is a black male/white female relationship is never show on tv/film withouth lots of nudging and winking about black penises and such.
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