They Say What Happens in Vegas, Stays in Vegas…
But not this time. Cause I’m gonna tell you about almost all of it!
I missed you bellas — been insanely busy and that vacay was VERY necessary. Internet cost $12 a day at the hotel, so I decided to step away from the computer altogether and spend my time hanging out with family and old friends, while making some new friends.
My sister in law lives in Las Vegas, and her husband was born and raised there. So we’ve visited before and done the Las Vegas strip — it’s so bright and exciting, but it can be too much. As someone who lives in Miami and hardly ever ventures over to South Beach, I must say that I empathize with Las Vegas locals. There’s much fun to be found off the strip, and I love discovering a city’s hidden gems. Here’s a review of my Las Vegas experience. Let’s start with the hotel!
Here I am, all prettied up to hit the strip and posing in our hotel room.
Like the black dress? I got it at B & Lu, and I LOVE it. Great experience shopping with them, affordable, tres chic, and ooh, are those subtle little pockets nobody notices unless you want them to? Great deal, definitely recommend.
OK, let me tell you about the hotel!
The Green Valley Ranch resort is gorgeous and sprawling — there’s a first rate spa, a big casino with several restaurants (ranging from fancy steakhouse to pancake house, with a food court, buffet marketplace, and a pretty good Cheesecake Factory rip off besides that). There’s also a cinema, a concert venue (Seal played there the night of the wedding), and a beautiful pool area, where I pretty much spent all my time.
If you’ve been following me on Twitter, you’ll know — the cocktails by this pool are amazing. I loved the Kusababa, a frozen blend of pina colada and Zen green tea liqueur, and the pineapple mojitos, which always go down smooth. Las Vegas sun absolutely bakes your skin and leaves you dry, so I gotta give props to Neutrogena — that Ultra Sheer sunblock kept my skin in tact. I came home about two shades toastier and with glowy cheeks, but my skin isn’t peeling or flaky at all. I love the SPF 45, and it always amuses me when people are surprised at the sunscreen I’m using. Skin cancer is a risk no matter how dark your skin is, and it’s important to know that
higher SPF doesn’t always mean higher protection. I apply carefully and reapply often.
Our days were spent poolside, but every night we did something fun — first stop, Fado Irish Pub for cocktails. It’s a fun, inviting chain of pubs that I’ve also visited in Chicago, and my new brother in law Rich, works at the Las Vegas pub. Stop by, have a drink, and tip the tall, friendly redheaded bartender if you’re in the neighborhood!
Friday night we spent at The Peppermill, an atmospheric, old school Vegas lounge that looks like a rundown HoJo on the outside. We chilled in the Fireside Lounge, which has a flaming pool, recessed couches, and giant fruity drinks on the menu. As the website indicates: “Featured insuch films as “Casino†and â€Showgirls†and seen on TV in “CSI Las Vegas†and “Elimidate.†(tee hee). This place makes for great I-wonder-what’s-your-profession people watching, by the by.
Saturday was the wedding, and it was absolutely magical. Held at the quaint and adorable Little Church of the West just across from the Mandalay Bay hotel, the ceremony was ten minutes long at most, and the crowds waiting outside took more photos of our wedding party than of their own, it seemed — people took the Seventies dress code seriously!! Which brings me to a blogging first, and part of my New Year’s resolution to be a braver blogger.
I’ve referred to my husband quite often on this blog, and I’ve posted many photos of my own immediate family — specifically my sister Petal, my parents, my little niece Dominique. I’ve even visited my in-laws before, and wrote all about the wonderful trip I’ve had. But I’ve never before posted a photo of my husband or his family, for one simple reason. He’s asked me not to. But we’ve talked recently, and two years after starting this blog, he’s finally cool with me sharing the other parts of my life with the world.
So everyone, meet Steve, the love of my life, and my wonderful family of in-laws.
Spoiler alert — True Life: I’m in an interracial marriage.
My reasons for not really writing about this before are many — the main one being that my husband and I have faced a little discrimination before from close family and so-called friends in the past, and we didn’t really want to deal with it on the internet, where people reveal pretty horrific prejudices behind the guise of anonymity. Or rather, my husband was just like look — I see how upset you get when you get a bad comment from a reader about a mere product review. Imagine how you’d feel dealing with comments judging our relationship? Imagine how you’d feel if you somehow lost readers because of our relationship?
He’s just trying to protect me because he knows how sensitive I can be. Behind the scenes on this here blog that I consider to be so positive and uplifting, I’ve gotten some downright disturbing comments. In the past, they’ve upset me tremendously. I’ve also gotten annoyed when visiting some of the blogs I read every day, and seen relationships between different races dismissed out of hand as “jungle fever.” It really sticks in my craw when it’s assumed that a relationship is based on little more than skin tone or outward appearance, as though love and the person inside had nothing to do with it. It bothers me because I’ve had people come at me with the most ludicrous assumptions about our relationship.
I’ve had people I thought were friends cut me off completely, back in college. We’ve faced angry questions about what our kids would be labeled as (as though that should be some kind of a deterrent to us having children). It’s been a decade now that we’ve been best friends, and nine years we’ve been together romantically. We’ve been married for six amazing years. I have a different perspective now, and it feels weird and wrong to exclude or hide this part of my life for fear of the reaction of others.
I’m putting all of this out there with just one simple message. I’m rambling and I’m writing this after 2 in the morning and I’m still jet lagged and this post is really just supposed to be a fun lighthearted visit Vegas travel post… but I hope you all forgive me if I get heavy for a moment.
I believe that love is about looking past what’s on the surface, and getting to know, appreciate, and understand each other on a deeper level. What I’m trying to say is, beautiful things can happen when you give a relationship a chance and try not to wrap your future in expectations. I married my best friend from college, and at one point I would never have even considered him as a romantic possibility, much less the soul mate I always dreamed I’d find. In many ways — much to my surprise — our differences have made us a stronger couple. And we’ve discovered similarities I would never have guessed we had, back when I would never ever thought I’d settle down with someone who didn’t fit the assumptions I’d made for myself. Real, true, lasting love goes so much deeper than what you see on the outside. And sometimes, you find it in the most unexpected places.
OK, tangent over. Now — a slideshow of fun wedding photos!
This wedding was super fun and done affordably — after the chapel we had dinner at a Mexican restaurant, then the party bus took us to Dino’s, “the last neighborhood bar in Vegas.” I love a dive bar, and this fit the bill superbly. And we took that place over! It was an absolute blast. My sister in law, Kate, got her dress on Ebay! Rich rented his tux from somewhere online, and my husband wore his dad’s prom suit. The days after the wedding we spent re-visiting the strip — my brother in law Patrick and his girlfriend had yet to see the beautiful water show at the Bellagio, or the Venetian, and we strolled along admiring the grandeur and sleaze. There’s no other city like Las Vegas, and I’m happy to visit anytime. It was a very positive and fun trip, full of love and revelry. Kate, I love you. Rich, welcome to the family. Congratulations on the most fun wedding ever!
And now I’m back, bellas! I’ve got a fresh perspective on life and so much to blog about. Did you miss me?
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Is Vegas crazy? I’ve never been but I’m guessing it is. I know this term isn’t politically correct but what the hell? you’ll know what I mean anyway. Well, I hope you do. Is it just a place where the white trash of America acculmilate to gamble there life’s away and for women to act like complete utter hoare’s getting as much plastic surgery as possible….. or is it o.k. I’d like to know….
Curious Bex
Bella, I admire you. I truly do. Not only are you an inspiration to be naturally me but you have gone outside of the norm and challenged societies sense of beauty and acceptance.
I don’t know if I am the only one to think this but I am really impressed by how brave you are to stand up and embrace the natural you being in an interracial marriage. The european american standard of beauty is pervasive and not everyone is brave enough to do challenge it. I say this from truly investigating myself. I went to a prep school from grade 1 to 12 and there were maybe 3 black people in my class. I can honestly say that I wanted to fit in with the standard of beauty that surrounded me, long straight hair. Even now as I explore natural styles, including a big puffy afro, I wonder if I would have had the gumption to do this in my professional field if i were not at an african american organization.
the more I read and learn the more proud i become and I admire your acceptance of yourself.
Marriage is a gift from God and I hope yours is blessed.
Oh! and kudos to your honey for stepping out of the box too!
“Spoiler alert — True Life: I’m in an interracial marriage.”
I love that you did this with sincerity and some humor. This day in age – if one is lucky to find love no matter what package it comes in, you need to hang on to it and never let it go.
Thank you so much for revealing this side of your life to us! Your husband is FINE! I could see why you would want to keep that on the DL lololol! Love You Bella!
Hello Bella!
I stopped by today to drop a line about a completely unrelated matter, and was so pleased to find that you were back after your vacation! Vegas sounds like an amazing time. I have very close friends there, and have been meaning to get there for a little visit for years, but things always come up. I’m inspired to try harder to get there!
I am also in an interracial marriage. My husband and I got married a little under two months ago, and had been together four years previous. When we started dating, we got some comments about ‘jungle fever’, and his family, in an effort to demonstrate acceptance, found it necessary to point out the differences between our cultures and appearances regularly (notably my hair!). The thing that made this so particularly hard to take is that fact that my husband and I have known each other since we were children. Before we cared about or noticed things like colour or race, we made each other laugh, and shared a passion for music. I was lucky enough that my husband persevered through the years when I was too dense to notice that the perfect man was already in my life (he figured it out when we were about twelve!), and as adults (we’re both in our thirties now) we made the decision to be together.
I’m sure you already know this, but those negative reactions are only a response to people’s own issues, and has nothing to do with the love between two people. You can see in your pictures how much love there is between the two of you. Imagine missing out on that amazing connection because of something as ultimately unimportant as race! Those people preoccupied with race are missing out on the possibility of wonderful, deep and meaningful relationships of all kinds with the diversity of people who cross our path everyday. It’s too sad.
The reason I originally stopped by was to thank you for the Creme of Nature! My hair has never felt so good. I have to remind myself after I shampoo that I haven’t already conditioned. My hair feels great!
What a great “love story” (LOL!) Thanks for sharing that and Welcome, Steve! Bella, the way you described your hubby as best friend & soul mate…. no wonder you always have a rosy glow! Continue to glow & grow with your man! Have a great weekend.
bella:
just so you know….i’m givin’ “east coast side-eye action” at your goin’ to vegas! ‘cos I wanted to venture to sin city this summer…but decided moving had to take precedence! LOL
glad u enjoyed yourself!
and, on the hubster picture posting/IR marriage tip:
“be who you are and say what you feel, because those who matter don’t mind and those who mind DON’T matter!”
- Dr. Theodore Geisel (aka Dr. Seuss – a very wise man, indeed)
and y’all’s look mighty happy!
BTW, i also loved your dad’s commentary!
Hey Bella
Its been a while, i love your hair in the 1st pic, what do you use to get so many curls. and great post by the way
Welcome back, darlin’! This is a FANTASTIC post. Gotta love love. People can say what they want but it really does make the world go ’round. Let’s keep up on Twitter. I’m cosmicgirlndc over there.
Keep on keepin’ on,
Erica
African-AmericanBrides.com
http://twitter.com/cosmicgirlndc
I have a white brother in law, an black/asian/native american nephew, an black/italian niece, and some creole twins on the way courtesy of another brother in law. Whenever we are all together, peoples eyes bug out trying to “place” everyone. They will come up & be like “now who belongs to whom?” . The world of race is getting so undefined now. I think it’s beautiful & awesome & eye-opening to be brave like you Bella! I love this blog & have never been to vegas but always wanted to go so I will definitely be booking a trip soon.
I’m so glad you’re back!!!
I just read through a few of the responses and the one from your father was very touching
Take from someone who has lived her entire life in a melting pot of culture, love…correction, true love does not see color, it has no boundaries. I have 5 sisters and my father always told us to be with the one who makes happy no matter what the color. You and your husband together create the perfect color of love. And because I am lover of poetry, here an excert from one my favorite poems:
Color of Love
By Cal Evans
Morning’s light reveals,
the angel next to me.
Lying silent and still,
fragile yet strong.
I watch her stir,
blink her eyes and smile,
simple acts that take my breath away.
Before my eyes, she descends,
from heaven back to earth,
my companion for another day.
You see her hair is the shade of all my dreams,
her voice is a warm embrace.
Her smile is the beacon that guides me on,
and her eyes as the color of love.
–Thanks for sharing this part of your life Afrobella. It doesn’t change anything with me, you still have the BEST Blog!!
Peace & Love.
your mother-in-law is the bomb-diggity!!
ROTFLMAO @ the powder blue suit and ruffle shirt!!!! Where did he find that suit? Let me guess it was the same suit that his dad married his mom in!!!! I can’t stop laughing.
Anyhoo, I’m sure glad that you’re back. The first thing I do when I log onto the computer is check CNN to ensure the world is safe then your site in hopes of reading a great product review.
I thought you mentioned once before that you were in a interracial relationship. I do understand and respect your reasons for wanting to protect what is most sacred to you.
I rarely ever discuss my family with people either. Because there is always someone out there who wants to judge or hate on you. And what my husband and I have is precious and I just don’t want to let anyone in. I didn’t even tell many people when I was pregnant because I wanted that nine months to be something special just for my husband and I. I didn’t want anyone coming into our little world.
I know you needed a vacation but I am so glad you’re back. I was missing your blog!
Anyhoo, I’m happy that you had a wonderful time and I’m happy that you’ve decided to post a picture of your hubby. (Who, by the way, is a cutie!) You two are cute! And I’m happy that you have your soulmate and have love in your life regardless of all the superficial stuff that’s so irrelavant to happiness. I’m happy you’ve found love!
Thanks for sharing, Bella!
Much Love….
5 million responses later I STILL wanna add my support and say you’re husband is FINE!
definitely looking like a keeper and i’m super happy you put your brave face on and decided to let us in. mek mi feel like mi a part a u fambily! hehe
Bella, I am new to the site and just wanted to let you know how much I have enjoyed reading. Don’t let others affect u with their ignorance. My grandmother always said that misery luvs company, and letting them get to u, u just invited urself to the party! Continue to be u and provide all the other bellas in the world inspiration!
I am so happy you have shared your ‘ramblings.’ Thank you for sharing your story. I love your blog and I want to welcome Steve on board. I don’t mind seeing a little Baby Bella soon either (:
Live your life girl. As we say in Jamaica: “No watch no face.”
WELCOME BACK!!! Welcome Steve! Thanks, as always, for sharing. One of the many reasons I absolutely adore this blog (and by extension someone I don’t know and may never meet) is because of your big heart. Don’t get me wrong, you give some fabulous recommendations, great reviews and interesting interviews, but this blog is about so much more. You’ve created quite a little community here, and I’m a proud part of your following.
Hey, Bella!
I also remember you mentioning in an earlier post that you were in an interracial relationship and ever since then I have been dying to see your hubby. And I must admit, I am a little surprised. I was not expecting him to be soooooo cute! You two look great together and I wish you all the happiness in the world.
I hate when people act like an interracial relationship is so out of the norm. People have been mixing it up before the concept of race existed! And as long as people are happy and aren’t in it for the wrong reasons I say more power to you.
Bella, I think that you are truly an inspiration to Black women everywhere. We get so caught up in what we think that we are supposed to look like, supposed to act like, and whom we are supposed to love that we forget to live.
Keep doing you Bella because you inspire me to keep being me.
Thank God you are back. LOL You were truly missed.
Okay, your father brought me to TEARS. *sniff* You and your husband make a lovely couple. The fact that you were friends first and then fell in love…wonderful. I wish you many more wonderful years with your husband…who by the way has an amazing smile.
Girl please do not let any triffling IGNANT (yes purposely misspelled) people steal your Joy. At the end of the day you have made a covenant between your partner and God. I dont see anybody else in that equation so let the miserable ones be miserable and you stay focused on what truly matters: building a life together that will by its very existence improve our world…as we say back home.. “chile tell dem fool fool people fi gweh from u seen?!”
Tell dem A GOD RUN TINGS! heehee love your site and so so missed your postings and postive presence! Much love and happiness to you and Steve !
Hi Bella,
I absolutely loved your post! I’ve never been a fan of Vegas because I just wasn’t interested in the strip and partying, but your pictures made me want to actually visit. Also, I am currently in an interracial relationship and at times it has been hard because we get so many ugly stares being in central PA. You would think by this point people would be more open-minded. But regardless, we love each other and continue to support each other. So thank you for your story because it certainly encouraged me.
Lil Sis…Bella!
At the risk of sounding like a broken record, you know I have to say how proud you continue to make me! Liek Dad I was aprehensive for you, not so much for what you revealed but as to how much! You have to be so careful in this crazy world these days!
I am so happy that you are surrounded by love and get so much love from your readers, and that’s because you are true, honest and loving yourself!
Welcome back, I’ve missed you like your readers!
ps…what you need to do now is write about your handsome and cool brothers! Hah hah!
This was such a great post, very entertaining. The pics spoke of a good time.
Bella, I stumbled across your blog when you had one post up. I’ve been a faithful reader ever since. I’ve only commented one or two times — but I read your blog everyday and is it weird that I have the strongest desire to meet you and give you a hug and thank you for being such a wonderful, intelligent and beautiful woman. I am of Colombian and German heritage, so most of the hair tips you give on this blog might not work for me (some do tho!), but I love everything else you write about. Your makeup tips are great and I really do love when you get political… even if it might get a little heated up in here hahaha Anyways, I just wanted to write to let you know that your husband is very cute and you guys are so BEAUTIFUL together! Who the hell cares about the haters, Bella? How can anyone possibly hate on two people in love and so happy? If they do, they’re certainly not worth anyone’s time.
The wedding looked so much fun!!!! I love it! Yo, I’m so out to Vegas for my 21st in February!
What a cutie! No, really. He’s cute. VERY.
You two look great together. I’m glad you had a good time. I recently discovered your blog. I love it. It’s amazing. I definitely plan to keep checking it out. Have a great weekend!
Hi Bella! I’m glad you’re back and that you had a safe trip! Looks like you really had fun. Like the others I was having Afrobella post cravings and was going into withdrawal
And your husband is a cutie, you two make a beautiful couple! I enjoyed and was inspired by what you wrote, and totally agree…True love conquers all!
girl, love is love! peace and blessings to you and yours.
I’m late on this, but when I clicked and saw your adorbs photo my reaction was thus:
“Gasp! Awwwww!” <3 Love is love, and you can see that in the picture, and read it in your writing. Thank you for continuing to share!
Hi Bella
I’ve been reading your blog and it is very informative and you and steve really make a drop dead georgoeus couple and very proud of all that you have accomplished.
Glad that you enjoyed the wedding. Did you do any gambling?
Will call you weekend. Love & kisses Aunt Opal
Congrats on your new marriage!!
I was in a wedding this past weekend… Love is in the air!! It’s a beautiful thing when two people decide to become one regardless of race. What makes your blog the best is that you are personable with your readers and you feel like our best girlfriend. I wish you the best for your marriage and in life.
Darshall
P.S. Let us know if any afrobellitas are in the near future.
Wow. I have been reading your blog for about 3 or 4 months now and have tried some of the hair products you suggested on my natural hair. I am in my 40′s so I was raised in a time when white people where not be trusted. I just assumed that you were with a black man. Old heads like myself need to wake up, I would love to find my soulmate. I may have missed him because I have never dated a white man because of my narrow-minded views.
Keep up the good work.
Bella, it is clear from all the posts today that those who love you and support your craft totally outweigh the few negative nellies out there (including some inner voices maybe? hmmm??). I check in to read and hear your voice, to learn from you and to relate with you because I see myself in your posts. You touch us all. Your interesting and diverse life (as you share it)only builds and reinforces the character and strength of the woman behind the words. Sure, initially I clicked here because I am constantly seek hair solutions – who doesn’t? But I come back here weekly because of the sense of community I feel the moment I open the page. I love how open and inclusive the posts have been this past season(i.e., twitter invite, transgendered young man, marital hair issues, etc..) and touched upon the reality of individuals as they seek to find and claim their own sense of beauty in this world. Thank you for providing a forum for our questions and answers and responses. In return, I hope you feel free to continue to be as honest and open as you have been in the past and as you were yesterday.
your hubby is a cutie. and you too look amazingly happy together. love isn’t about race – it’s about love!
oh it was a 70s wedding?! How fun! you all look wonderful!
Beautiful! Your husband, your blog, Dad and Mom’s comments, your readers comments, the wedding….and you! All of it is just beautiful and makes me smile
Wonderful Bella,
I have truly enjoyed your in-laws and your trip to Vegas.The pictures were great. The couple did there wedding in a 70′s theme for a reason.The 70′s were a free to love and fun time.I was able to see that on the pictures.You have a wonderful (in-law)family.
I grew up with a family that was very diverse.
I say to you that if your happy and feel alot of love from him and his family. That is all that matters.You can’t stop Haters from hating.
9 times out of 10 there not happy with there self and life. I was able to see alot of LOVE coming off of those pictures and alot of tips on fashion and beauty..
Keep that smile on your face and just LOVE..
Peace!!!!Bella
Your husband looks like Vin Diesel with the shades on! FINE HONEY!!!! LOL!
Glad you had a great time. Isn’t Vegas the best? Damm this economy…I need a need a trip!
Take Care!
Wecome back Bella! You and your hubby are adorable!
Bella/Patrice,
How blessed are we that you decided to share that part of your life with us! I never thought your hubby was black, but it was irrelevant, since your love for him was a vibrant thing. What I’ve always felt connected to is your beautiful and inspiring spirit. Thank you for continuously helping me see beauty in my days. I wish you and Steve nothing but love, laughter, toasts and forever
Peace!
Bella, your husband would have had to be a goat for me to take offense and stop reading this blog. I’m not going to add to all the “He’s cute!” comments b/c I’m sure Steve’s having enough trouble fitting his head through doorways, but you two make a beautiful couple and he’s lucky to have snagged such a bella afrobella as you.
Remain blessed,
~H
Thanks for sharing Bella. You and your husband make one cute couple.
I wish you both much love and happiness!!!
Okay, I’m totally late on this, but I’m glad you’re back and that you had a great time in Vegas!
And yeah, I too seem to recall your mentioning your being in an IR. I agree with whoever said upthread that you were just HIDING his cutie-pie self from us! lol
Girl, look: Life is too short, the world is too big, and true love is RARE. I know you’re younger than me but I don’t remember if you’re in your 20s or 30s (sorry!).
Here’s my point, though: The biggest miracle to happen to me in my 40s is realizing that 98% of what I thought was my sh** ain’t my sh**. I’m still looking for the kind of love you’ve already found and if I’m lucky enough to find it the world can just KMMFA. Some people call this decade the “eff-you forties”…that is SO where I’m at right now, I need to get me a KMMFA T-shirt!
I can’t help but think that you have some of this attitude already because you wouldn’t have stuck this blogging thing out if you didn’t have it. SO many people enjoy what you share and it would be a crime to allow a few ig’nant MFers to shut you down in ANY aspect…writing, loving, living, whatever. You are an inspiration to many…don’t you ever forget it!
You are happy. That is all that matters!
thx steve for sharing your wife with us.
I’m a happy and in love “afrobella” in a interracial relationship and who so ever dares to have an issue with two people being in love (black/white) has an issue with God (don’t make me start preaching lol) because he doesn’t see color/race. Shame, shame them! You two are a delight to see together! Don’t let anyone take away that glow by words or opinion…in the end no one really matters but you two! Love you Patrice! You just keep enlighting us on how to keep our natural doo’s looking pretty and ignore that negative energy =)! Remember it can’t live unless you feed it. By the way GREAT PICS!!! Looks like you all had a BLAST!!
Girl, as long as the man you love is treating you right then you answer to no one about your relationship. Though I’m not in an interracial relationship right now, i’ve dated outside my race before (white guys) and have experienced some of the same prejudice you’ve spoken of. In some cases, I still have certain people making little comments about my supposed “love of whitey” and how I should be “ashamed of myself as a sista” (blah blah blah) even though I’m no longer dating said men–but simply because I still see nothing wrong with it. Ugh. Keep your head up, I know how ignorant people can be. Love isn’t easy to find so when you got it, hold on to it, especially if he loved you enough to ask for your hand in marriage. That’s huge! Not too many men are willing to commit like that these days so I’m happy for you. =0)
http://www.GangstarrGirl.com
i am normally a quiet lurker but i started getting into a lot of your old and new posts this year and i enjoy your website. you and your husband make such a beautiful couple. just reading about how protective he was of you before you made this post is admirable and quite frankly, to see love like that of any colour is inspiring.
great pics btw. this post has me in the mood to hit vegas one day.